Baby boomer body image

While speaking with women for Locker Room Diaries, I decided to dedicate a chapter to women in their 50s, 60s, 70s…I even spoke with a 91-year-old yoga instructor (some of you may recall my story of the wonderful Becky :-) Like caterpillars having spent their fair share of time working away in the cocoon of life, going through so many experiences and transitions, these mature women have finally emerged. Contrary to popular thought, they are the butterflies of the locker room, not the young ladies flitting about in their low-slung gym shorts and shrunken sorority baby tees. It just so happens that typically, when one “emerges” from any sort of womb, insect or human, she tends to be naked. And older women…well, in the locker room, they just always seem to be naked. And confident to boot. I wanted to learn from them.

Indeed, many of these women had phenomenal “to hell with it” attitudes – they loved their wrinkles and scars, which represented a life well lived, diseases fought (and won), children created and raised and much more. Others still struggled with body image concerns and even eating disorders. Below, in conjunction with the Today Show’s current segment on baby boomer fashion, I’ve decided to offer up some snippets of conversations I had with some of the women.

Harriet, 57; Public relations executive

“I am 57 and work out about three to four times per week. Body image has been an ongoing thorn in my side since way before puberty. Since I always considered myself ‘fat,’ working out has been an obsession for nearly 47 years.

Some kids used to say I had piano legs. Back in those days, girls weighed 110, 115. I was 125. But I was flexible – I could do backbends, stretches. Unfortunately, from those stupid comments, I saw myself as being very fat. Still do.
I started working out in junior high. At 16, I started swimming laps three times week. I kept that up until I was 50. My husband knew if I didn’t get my exercise routine in, I would be a menace to live with. The problem was, I never saw a change in my body. After a while, I’d add more on, like I would Rollerblade two miles to the pool, swim laps and then Rollerblade home. Still, nothing. But now that I’m in my 50s, I’ve come to realize it kept my body aerobically toned and in good health. Now I do the elliptical, lift weights and yoga – that’s made a big change. My muscles are more sculpted. So I guess you could say I started working out for vanity, but now the motivators have changed to both vanity and health. So I got to the same place for different reasons, but I am thankful I am here, nonetheless. Had I not worked out as much as I did throughout my life, I might be like other 57 year olds with myriad health problems.

One of my daughters is actually significantly overweight and it terrifies me. Not obese, but still. She used to be a stunningly beautiful girl when she lived in my house. I didn’t allow fast food and I made them exercise. But as soon as she went to college, all my efforts went down the drain. So now we’re doing Weight Watchers together.
Right now, I’m thinking of getting a face-lift, but you can’t work out for four weeks afterwards and that terrifies me. Actually, anytime there has been a threat of gaining weight, I become anxious. Like during pregnancy; I gained 45 pounds with each pregnancy, even though I worked out every day with both kids. Or if my husband wants to take me on a cruise; everyone knows you gain weight on a cruise. I guess you could say the possibility of getting bigger has been the primary motivator behind a lot of my choices in my life…

Looking back, the thought that I was obese at 125 pounds makes me laugh. Why did I think I was obese? My youngest daughter weighs a couple of pounds more than I did and we’re the same height and she has the most beautiful figure. I mean, she’s put together a little differently: Her weight is mostly in the bust and she has a slimmer legs and hips. But I still marvel at that. Sometime I look at this picture of myself as a young girl and think, wow, I based so many decisions in my life on the fear of gaining weight.”

Patty, 58; Lawyer, former ballerina

“I started studying ballet when I was younger than five and the belief was, the thinner your were, the more value you had. We learned how not to eat and we did it because we wanted to be prima ballerina. The older girls taught each other how to purge or be anorexic. It was a secret society.

For me, the eating stuff began when I was nine or 10 and started dancing on pointe shoes. You wanted to be the star. I danced until I was 47, keeping active with lessons and in companies. The actual eating disorder didn’t stay that long, but I’ve always had eating issues, and I’ve always been able to spot them. I remember in my 30s, one of the dance companies had hired a new dancer and during a performance, she started shaking. My husband and I were in the audience and I leaned over and whispered ‘That’s an amphetamine shake.” He asked, ‘Well, how do you know?’ It’s because I took them. At the time we called them diet pills. The physicians prescribed them to us. I was 5’2”, weighed 90 pounds soaking wet and thought I was fat…

Even now, at 105 pounds, I wear a size 2, sometimes a 4, and the littlest bit of change makes me wonder – am I getting fat? That’s hard for me to admit. I try to eat very sensibly. I will never put donuts in my mouth. Maybe it’s the thought of being overweight – I don’t think it will ever end for me. I want to be healthy but I don’t think it will be ‘healthy’ in the medical profession sense… ‘healthy’ will always be too fat for me.

My daughter knows about my past. I felt if I hid it from her, it would be disastrous. I wanted her to know that when we danced, it wasn’t the best culture for body image. And I am able to look at other women who aren’t stick thin and appreciate their beauty. So how come I can’t be happy with myself? So I’ve always tried to instill lessons in my daughter like make sure you have good girlfriends for support, make sure you have people you trust, and always have someone to tell you that you look gorgeous.”

Pat Brown, 64; President, American Association for Nude Recreation

“I’ve had three kids. I have sagging skin from losing a lot of weight at one point and I had a breast reduction. But I feel comfortable in it because I feel it’s representative of bodies everywhere and after all, my body isn’t Pat. Pat is what’s inside. It’s like my husband says, it’s the only one I have and I’ve got lots of other things to do with my life other than obsess about a perfect body. Like when I’m out in the garden, working in the nude – I feel at one with earth. I feel a part of that garden. We have an outdoor shower and I love it for the same reason – it is so wonderful to shower beneath the trees with no walls, like being in a waterfall. At those moments, what my body looks like…I don’t want to say I’m oblivious because I’m healthy, I exercise, I eat a healthy diet, but it’s not all that’s on my mind.”

Comments

Pat's comment about the nude gardening was kinda weird.

Leslie
thanks for posting this...women need to know that there are other women out there with similiar feelings. To change the thinking about body image, we need to start a dialogue and see women who are real. Women connecting and sharing is always a beautiful thing. Such honesty. Read my post about a few snide comments about Many Moore in a bikini...if you click on my name it will take you to the post.

Thanks for pointing this out, Dawn. I'll post here what I posted on your blog - It's absurd that the blogger called Mandy Moore fat and ridiculed her for wearing a bikini. Mandy is gorgeous and has a smashing figure. The writer's comments are hurtful and dangerous. Not that we should care TOO much - the snarky writer doesn't even know how to use proper grammar (String bikini's need to be set aside for models). There's no apostrophe in bikinis!
Stupid.

Great blog! Thanks. I recently had breast reduction surgery and by accident I stumbled upon www.thepatientsadvantage.com. I used them when looking for a surgeon.
What I liked the most was that my profile remained anynomyous until I was ready to decide what to do. I received replies from four surgeons that met all the things I was looking for. I liked having that complete control without the sales pressure that some of these places can be known for.
If you are going to go down the cosmetic surgery road...better to be safe than sorry. Check them out.

i just wanted to say i used this product and now i sell it , it worked for me now it can for u if you dont belive it ask me i did it no kidding

as i was saying i used this
http://www.bigleagueplayersclub.com/3clicks/published/3985/6827/index.htm
now i want u to see for your self