This is what Thankful means...

My family dinner Thursday went surprisingly smoothly, considering the tredipation I felt about the holiday. I spent a day with my mom and sister-in-law, chatting and cooking (well, my sis, the fourmet chef, cooked. All I did was cut up a butternut squash. Damn! Those things take effort. Like, biceps and shoulder muscles! I was so fatigued from cubing a simple vegetable that I had to lie down and passed out for 30 minutes.)

Then, on T-Day, we had 10 family members over to my parents' house and lounged around, ate, watched bad TV - I fear I killed a large number of brain cells by getting sucked into a marathon of a horribly stuped show called MANswers - and, most importantly, did a lot of laughing and enjoying each other's company.

As we sat down to the actual feast and started passing stuffing and carnberry sauce, turkey and Jell-o mold, I looked over and saw my grandpa, a wonderfully sensitive man who has also been strong of body and mind while also portraying an enviable appreciation of his feminine side...crying. Now this is not an unusual thing - as I said, Morty can be muey metrosexual and cries at things like me showing up wearing a cute top that he thinks I look good in, or the first time I actually baked something (at age 31, natch). But this time, he was sobbing. Hands over his eyes, tears down his cheeks, quietly sobbing. I nudged my husband and he looked at G, then back at me, and we smiled, because we both knew where the tears were coming from.

"I just want to say," Morty announced after a few up these episodes passed over the course of five minutes, "that it is my one wish that all of you, in 20 years, feel as happy and proud as your grandmother and I feel right now." In an especially funny twist, my grandma was not only NOT crying, but looked at her husband with a look of bemused astonishment and yelled out "Morty, how many Jack Daniels have you been drinking?!" I admit, JD was present, but just a bit and besides, my grandpappy cries sober all the freaking time.

But when he made his tear-filled proclamation, my heart warmed as I realized, THIS is what being thankful truly is. Loving your friends and family with an open heart. Being present. Taking time to let others know how your life is better just for having them in it.

I think making a list around this time of year is even more important that writing New Year's resolutions because saying what you're thankful for is so much more than eeking out a list of ways to "improve" yourself. It's reflection and acknowledgement. So here's part of my list:

I'm thankful for a husband who accepts every single part of me, who supports me in all of my enedeavors, who laughs with me - hard - because he gets my sense of humor more than anyone I know, and how is unendingly patient and understanding.

I'm thankful for my home, which Dan and I bought together and keeps us warm, protected, safe and represents our future together.

I'm thankful for my family...my parents who are still together after 35 years and support each other, especially through the hard times. And my grandparents - 60 years together and going strong - who serve as an example of what and who I want to become.

I'm thankful for my brother who is probably one of the coolest, smartest guys I know and continues to impress me with his success and perserverance. Jeff inspires me with his ability to brush setbacks off his shoulders, his creativity and his ability to accept others for who they are.

I'm thankful for my friends, who not only care about what's going on in my life, but care enough to share, in very real and raw ways, what's going in their worlds. These women lift me up, make me cackle with laughter, treat me as sisters to themselves and aunts to their babies.

I'm thankful to my readers - this blog has been a life-changing experience, allowing me to reach out and connect with compassionate, funny, whipsmart women from around the globe. If iVillage had never asked me to begin writing, I'd be missing out on so much stimulating conversation and, of course, the new friendships that have developed as a result.

Thanks also to my body, for keeping itself strong and fit and carrying me/pushing me through miles of running, hours of yoga and weight-lifting, even just letting me walk to the mailbox and back.

And on a more general note, I'm thankful for: Changing fall leaves and all they signify; women's rights advocates around the globe, striving to make changes for the better; my garbageman, who likely goes largely unnoticed but without him, this place would be in shambles; bad reality TV, which helps take me away (ironically) from reality; a smart, ready-to-be-cracked-open book; fresh fruit and chocolate; a 10-yr-old car that looks like something a robotic cat threw up but gets me from point A to point B; my beautiful engagement ring, which my husband's great grandmother and mother wore before me - it makes me feel so special; and for a career which lets me prattle on about issues large and small, which inspires others to think and rewards me emotionally, spiritually and financially.

Please, please...share what you are thankful for. I very much want to hear your answers.
Love,
Leslie

Comments

Wow leslie, this is a great excercise that i think is truly important for everyone to try (along with your "letter to your body" which you posted a while back, i loved that one!) Here my list:

I am thankful for right arm. I broke it last august in a bad accident and needed surgery. I neglected physical therapy but simply continued my usual workout routine always trying to push it a little further. Now its just as strong and the other arm (maybe stronger) and although the scar remains, its a great converstation starter.
I am so very thankful for my father, he's amazing. My mother died when i was just thirteen and although it was never easy for me, he supported me unconditionally. His motto is "your biggest investments should be your children", and he'd stuck to that all these years.
I am thankful for my sister and her pregnancy, its too bad my mom wont be here to see it, but i am thankful to have the oppertunity to be an aunt!
I am thankful for about thousand other things but i dont room in the post!

I'm thankful that after 8.5 years of trying, my husband and I finally found a clinic that treated us as people, not BMIs, and that I'm now pregnant with my first child.

I'm grateful to be back in the US, but also grateful that I had the opportunity to live overseas.

Finally, I'm thankful that my family and friends are healthy, safe, well, and that all of us have food to eat and a roof over our heads.

This is great!

I'm thankful for my husband, who supports me through thick and thin (and I'm not just talking about my weight,lol!). I'm thankful for my kids, and everything they teach me about love, patience, compassion, and kindness. For my in-laws, who have shown me what unconditional love is. For my kids' teachers, therapists, social workers, and everyone who teaches them (and us) how to live with autism, and does so with so much love! For my upbringing, which,ultimately, made me strong. For my brother, sister-in-law, and niece, for being the cool cats they are. And for everyone I've met online.

Here my list. Sorry it's a bit long :)

First I'm thankful for this blog and all the readers. You bring entertainment and thought into my boring work days ;)

I'm thankful for my loving boyfriend who makes me smile and laugh everyday.

I'm thankful for my body and it's ability to hike 14 miles in under 6 hours (!) and for my eyesight that allowed me to see the breathtaking view at the top of the 14 mile mountain hike.

I'm thankful for my job, the roof over my head, and the food in my belly.

But mostly I'm thankful for the chance to live my life the way I want with nothing stopping me but me.

I'm thankful for a job I love, I'm thankful for my health, my family and friends.

For all the women out there, I wanted to pass along this thought from the mom of one of the girls I teach (she is from Laos): "I'm so thankful my daughter was born in America. Any girl who is born in America is already one of the luckiest little girls in the world." So true.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Love this!! Reading everyone's comments made me all warm and fuzzy:)) I think I'm going to put Rose's "But mostly I'm thankful for the chance to live my life the way I want with nothing stopping me but me." on an index card and tape it to my mirror!

So my thankful list: my freedom. My loved ones. My health. My dreams. My mistakes (so I can learn from them...hopefully!). My books. My friends. And... dark chocolate! (Come on, someone had to say it!!).

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday! Thanks for the fuzzies, Leslie.

Um, I'm dumb. That last comment was from me and I typed in my e-mail username instead of my actual name. See that item about being thankful for my mistakes? I guess that starts now! Sorry for the double post.

Thanks for taking the time to write, everyone - I love learning more about you and this seems like a good way to do it :-)

You did it to me again.....The floodgates began widening the day you were born and have been expanding ever since... To express thankfulness to one's self or to others is truly a gift, no matter what the subject. However, for certain individuals, as in deep sorrow. when joy becomes so profound, the soul purges tears. For me, "Cry Me a River" comes to mind. The realization of the closeness of our family and the love shared says it all.
I love you and am so proud of you! oxoxoxo

You did it to me again.....The floodgates began widening the day you were born and have been expanding ever since... To express thankfulness to one's self or to others is truly a gift, no matter what the subject. However, for certain individuals, as in deep sorrow. when joy becomes so profound, the soul purges tears. For me, "Cry Me a River" comes to mind. The realization of the closeness of our family and the love shared says it all.
I love you and am so proud of you! oxoxoxo