Bras for all your 2000 parts
Is your butt sagging? Droopy? In need of some lifting and separating? Well, then I've got just the thing for you. For your butt, I mean.
The butt bra.
This strappy little number, the Feel Foxy! web site promises, "Holds up the weight of the buttocks, lifts and defines the buttock’s curvature, maximizes small/flat derrieres, leaves no visible line under most clothing, enhances the effect of from fitting clothes," and more. What - you didn't know your tush needed an upgrade from an A to a C? Well, it does! You can also try this dreamy padded panty for instant bootyliciousness. Bottoms up! If only poor Jennifer Love Hewitt had known about this, maybe she could have avoided all that public scrutiny over her bum (Note: I am being sarcastic.)
For the man in your life, may I suggest the fabulously named BallBra? It's a harness for his highness! This contraption is basically a sling that lifts his package up for purposes I simply am not aware of. (Be careful not to confuse the BallBra with the BraBall - I did this and unwittingly wound up emotionally scarring my grandma with her lingerie-inspired Hanukkah gift.)
Lastly, if you've been surgically enhanced in the chestage area, a plastic surgeon has come to the rescue with the new Le Mystère No. 9 bra, designed especially for women with rounder, more projected breasts and two-inch-wide cleavage. Says the web site, "No9’s wires are a complete semi circle, the exact shape of the implant, allowing the augmented breast to fit snuggly within the wire shape." (PS Don't you just love how, in the photo, the women is lying comfortably on a bed of rocks?!"
Remember, if you don't support yourself, no one else will!
Comments
Call me weird, but I found this endlessly amusing.
I was however shocked when I saw the padded panty at Walmart sometime this summer. I was even tempted to hang around to see if nayone picks it up...but then came to my senses and walked away.
Rocks lit from below, no less!! Maybe she's in hell?
Your poor grandma - she must be a very forgiving soul:)
PS> "a harness for his highness" ROFL!!
Rocks lit from below, no less!! Maybe she's in hell?
Your poor grandma - she must be a very forgiving soul:)
PS> "a harness for his highness" ROFL!!
Is it just me, or does the butt bra remind anyone of a female jock strap?
I'm glad booties are in because I've always had an ample one and all those squats have only made it stand out more.
Isn't it nice to know that there are all sorts of gadgets to improve how we look? Now a day, you don't have to live with the body or face you were born with. Enhancing your looks with a padded bra, butt enhancer, or thigh shaper is always better than surgery.
