7:05 pm

Yesterday afternoon I spent 50 minutes bitching and moaning to my therapist about my butt. Literally. It's a sore spot for me and I'm so freaking sick and tired of directing all my negative emotions, my stress and fear and anxiety, toward my tush. I mean, really? I'm 31 years old, write about body image for a living, lecture about my experience with anorexia and am STILL caring about cellulite on my ass? Embarrassing.

But a few hours later, driving home on Lakeshore Drive with my husband from a long day's work downtown, I spotted a figure running along Lake Michigan. Despite the filthy dirtyness of our '99 Cougar's windows, I spotted him, being showered with fat flurries and engulfed in temps had dropped about 50 degrees during the day, paving the way for an icy subzero evening. Through the snowflakes, I saw this man, probably in his 30s, running at a fast clip - outpacing traffic, actually. And this man had no legs.

He appeared to be a double-amputee and was wearing those carbon-fiber, prosthetic legs that resemble parentheses and fit over the knees. My jaw fell open as I watched. He was, in my eyes, the picture of strength, grace and determination. It was the high point of my day, seeing how amazing the human body/spirit can be.

It was also the low point of my day because it forced me to realize how royally f&*ked up my priorities are. A jiggly butt? I'm ashamed of myself.

"There's no such thing as bad weather, just soft people." - Nike co-founder and track and field coach Bill Bowerman

Do I make you horny, baby?

How excited was I to stop in Walgreen's just now and see a humongous poster of a green M&M, all dolled up with eyelashes and full lips, announcing to the world that Valentine's Day is coming and "Green is the new color of love"?! How adorbs! Apparently, Miss Green has only been with us since 1997, when she debuted...as the first and only female M&M Character (Yes, I have gone to the website. It's like candy porn.) Here are some fun facts about the notoriuous Spanish Fly-like diva:

Age: "Old enough to know better."
Weight: "How dare you!"
Turn-ons: "Simple candlelit dinners...in Paris."
Turn-offs: "Men and women who stare."
Best Attribute: "Honey, I can't even choose. That's your job." (You go girl!! - Leslie)
Appearance: "Beauty of this magnitude can't be described with words."
Shortcomings: "Can sometimes be intimidating."
Quotes: "I melt for no one."

Ummm...can you say "Girl Crush???"

Inspire me, please!

Hi everyone,
So...I've basically been wanting to write a second book ever since Locker Room Diaries was published in June of 2006. I have brainstormed. I have held informal focus groups (aka Gotten my girlfriends liquored up and bombarded them with questions.) I have scoured the web and spent so much time at Barnes & Noble that I am now on their "Most Wanted for Flipping Through Self-help Books But Never Buying" list.

I need inspiration.

This, my lovely, intelligent, fabulosity-infused friends, is where you come in.

What in the freaking hell should I write about?

A few keys:
a) Must be non-fiction (I tried fiction once and ended up with three pages of baaad chick-lit-ish drivel about a publicist named Ellie who is always late and...well, that's as far as I got.)
b) Must be woman-related in some way. Note: This does not mean it has to be about body image but I'd like to write about something that has to do with the XXes of the world.
c) Should allow me to use both my smarts, my sense of humor and my own personal experiences.

That's about it. What are you looking for in a fun, hip, must-read book, Weighting Game readers? What would make you knock an old lady over so you could grab the final copy off a shelf in Borders, clutching it to your chest while maniacally scraming, "It's Leslie Goldman's new book!!!"? I'm talking frenzy reminiscent of the Cabbage Patch storm of 1981 here.

Please, talk to me. The winner gets their name placed somewhat prominently in the Acknoweldegements section of whater tome they may inspire.

Thanks and love,
Leslie

What a crock...of deliciousness!!

"I am not a cook." - Leslie Goldman

This is what Richard Nixon would have said it he had a fabulous sense of humor and was making fun of moi. And he'd be right. I don't cook. My time spent in the kitchen usually involves assembling salads, microwaving soups, and pouring martinis. No stove required for any of these. On occasion, when I'm feeling particularly benevolent, I'll boil some pasta for my husband or even - yes, it's true - slap some BBQ sauce on a few salmon fillets and cook 'em up for din-din. But these heat-related events are few and far between.

Until.

I was recently introduced to the concept of slow-cooking. I always imagined this to be a, well, slow, laborious process that involved burdensome amounts of chopping, dicing, stirring and cleaning. But I am here to tell you that my new slow-cooker is a gift from the culinary gods, and I feel as if I have been saved.

I cracked open my Crock-Pot (the original brand, but all spiffed up in stainless steel) and set to work on a chicken and corn chowder recipe I'd found ridiculously easily by Googling "healthy, slow cooker, recipe." All I had to do was cube a potato (surprisingly easy - I've never actually used the BIG knife we got when we were amrried three years ago), chop up some green onions (*tear*) and cut up some chicken. I literally dumped it all in the pot with some creamed corn, chicken broth and pepper and put the lid on. Then I opened the direction packet and started to freak out because there were, like, eight different languages and lots of diagrams and other cooking-related stuff that scares me. So I popped a Valium (OK, it was a handful of Red-Hots) and calmed down...especially when I realized that the only directions I need to follow were:

Plug in appliance.
Use arrow button to enter time (six hours for me).
Press start.
Walk away.

Seriously, people, this is lazy woman's cooking at its best. Or, should I say, busy woman's cooking, because you can plop in all your ingredients at 7:30am, cook a delish meal while you're running around at work, and come home to a bubbling stew or veggie chili or a freaking entire pork roast if you want.

(This is what I looked like as I cooked. Cute, no?)

And...as they say in the commercials, clean-up IS a breeze!! You just stick the inner container in the dishwasher and let Mr. Cascade work his magic.

The chowder was yummy and filling (I added some instant mashed potato flakes and skim milk at the end to thicken it up) - perfect for these 88 below zero artic evenings we've been having in Chicago. Next I'm going to try a chicken and sweet potato dish, and if I feel particularly ambitious/PMSy, an apple and berry cobbler.

So I guess it looks like I will be spending a lil more time in the kitchen now that I have the culinary equivalent of a 10-years-younger boyfriend: It's eager-to-please, it lasts for hours, it puts a little skip in your step and it gves the impression that you're a huge catch.

Freakiest. Commercial. Ever!

This ridiculously eerie and completely nonsensical Tab diet soda commercial may be from the 1970s, but the batshit insanity of it all remains intact, 30+ years later. Watch it with the lights on and the doors locked because the spine-chilling songstress and her disturbing, Red-Rum-type lyrics ("be a mind-stickerrrr") will have you crying for Mommy.

PS Thanks to jezebel.com - without you, I never would have stumbled across this blast from the saccharine-fueled past. I also would be able to sleep in peace tonight but hey - you win some, you lose some.

Who wants a famous face?

Just in time for the weekend, the Beverly Hills Institute of Aesthetic and Reconstructive Surgery has released its annual "Hollywood's Hottest Looks" survey so get ready, grab your phone and call a doc - any doc with a scalpel - so you can request:

Katie Holmes's eyes
Angelina Jolie's lips
Jessica Biel's bod
Katherine Heigl's nose
Keira Knightley's cheeks
Paris Hilton's skin

Oh, men - fear not. Here's the blueprint for your perfect look:

Leonardo DiCaprio's nose
David Beckham's physique
Daniel Craig's (James Bond) baby blues
George Clooney's cheeks
Matt Damon's lips

What? You all didn't really think you were okay the way you are, did you?!

Dancing with the devil

"If our Lord wasn't testing us, how would you account for the proliferation, these days, of this obscene rock and roll music, with its gospel of easy sexuality and relaxed morality?" -- Reverend Shaw Moore, Footloose, 1984

"Hey, hey! What's this I see? I thought this was a party. LET'S DANCE!" -- Ren (aka Kevin Bacon), Footloose, 1984.

OK, so admittedly this was partly just an excuse for me to go hunting for fun quotes from one of my fave movies ever (oh, how I yearned to be Ariel with her red cowboy boots and awesomely feathered hair.) But these IS relevance to some crazy shenanigans currently taking place in Utah.

A group of college students has called out two Gold's Gyms, popular with Brigham Young University and Utah Valley State College, saying that the music videos being shown in thgym are pornographic. Five student orgs have collected nearly 1,000 signatures on a petition asking Gold's Gym to quit showing the videos.

ALSO...

The students are demanding that blinds be installed blinds in the aerobics room to block the view of people dancing, which is "very provocative."

Well, they almost came kinda close to having me see their side with the video issue, but they lost me at "provocative dancing."

Here's my take: Many music videos are bad for our emotional health. They may be degrading or exploit women - that's not really debatable. And people should be able to work, shop and workout in a world where they don't feel degraded or exploited.

But my friends, that is a fairy tale land where Caramello bars grow from trees and sparkly unicorns make cozy house pets.

Yes, I am always urging you/myself to rally against the ad agencies that show women as inanimate objects/victims of violence/dismembered body parts in orer to sell their swag. This, I believe in. And I do wish that gyms didn't show videos of girls having credit cards swiped through their butts (Nelly). In fact, some of you may recall my writing about a mild tirade I went on years ago at a Bally's when they played Weird Al Yankovic's video "Fat" because I thought it sent the wrong message to clients.

But I also think that likening Jazzercise to the Red Light District is indicative of a very stringent, unrealistic and outdated viewpoint. If somebody asked me to stop dancing/stretching/Downward Dogging because they thought I was being too provocative, I would proceed to turn around, hike my shorts up to my collarbone, and attempt a tripod just to piss them off. In fact, I remember once working out with my friend Ali at a gym in Rochester, MN, owned by the Mayo Clinic, and an employee asked me to put a tee shirt on (I was wearing a tank top). This was a no-shoulders-allowed gym. I was way upset. Why the hell should I wear clothing that makes me physically uncomfortable (I sweat like Michael Jordan when I exercise and tees make me feel gross) simply because of some gym policy? I grudgingly wrapped a towel around my shoulders and the minute he walked away, I threw it down with dramatic flair.

Then again, am I being hypocritical? I want to be comfortable and resent opinions that I deem offensive, but these students, obviously, feel the same. Who's to say the more liberal among us are right? (I mean, we are, but still.) It's a tough quandry.

Allright, I'm rambling now...perhaps because I just realized that I might not be practicing what I preach. Tell me - do you think a gym should have to turn off videos that certain patrons find offensive? I suppose that, to make changes, starting small, like at our local gym, makes more sense that attacking global campaigns. And does this pave the way to banning radio because the lyrics are degrading?

And what of the dancing thing?

I'm going to go boogie some stress away in my family room.

PS If you are reading this blog and this blog references Kevin Bacon, you are officially just two degrees away from him. Mazel tov.

Sorry, Trista, I'm not trying to hate but...

(Please note as you read: I really am not trying to be catty here).

I think it's wonderful that Trista Rehn has been able to fulfill her goal of "being thin" by new year. As some of you may recall, in an October 2007 issue of Us Weekly, the new mom said she was on a mission to lose the last of the 30 pounds she gained during pregnancy. “I’m definitely not pleased when I look in the mirror,” the 5-foot-2 reality TV star, who at that point was sporting size 4 pants, weighed 116 pounds and had a three-month-old baby boy said. Her ideal weight: “When I fit into my size 26 Hudson jeans, then I’ll be happy.”

Or, in real-world measurements, "when I have a waist with a circumference of a honeydew melon."

Well, mission accomplished. Trista, a former dancer, is currently on the cover of the mag in a yellow bikini, indeed looking tiny and hot, hoisting her baby on her left breast. I assumed things had been photoshopped - not in a "Ha! No way could she attain that bod on her own" way but more in a "Staus quo, blah blah, I'm sure they touched up her abs a bit like they do to everyone" way.

Then, I stumbled across some pics of Trista on the beach - candids, free from airbrushing. And you know what? She looks fan-freaking-tastic. But she does not look like she does on the cover. Check it out for yourself:

Why? Why, why, why? Why change how good she looks? Why smooth away every pore, erase any sign of age, digitally liposculpt her freaking knees, steal away any indication she had ever produced a child (except for her ample post-baby bosom)? For that matter...why is this on the cover of a magazine? Why do we love it? Hate it? Crave it and loathe it? WHO, exactly, needs this kind of "fixing"?

Gym class heroes...not

Crabby McSlacker over at Cranky Fitness just wrote about gym class memories and her stories got me thinking about my own experiences. And by “experiences,” I mean “being picked last for team sports, avoiding inadvertent locker room showings of my training bra and being clocked at 0.0 seconds in the Presidential Physical Fitness Test bent arm hang.”

Ahh…memories.

Truthfully, I have awful memories of PE - I was bigger and (unknowingly) suffering from hypothyroidism which, combined with a total lack of athletic ability, made me a social pariah in gym class. I remember running "The Mile" for the Presidential Physical Fitness Test in sixth grade (actually, "running" should be in quotes, as I walked most of it. This was due to both low stamina and a serious dedication towards my wall of hairspray-shellacked bangs). I think I finished it in 15 minutes and was sweaty for the next six periods of class. If someone had told me I’d be voluntarily running numerous miles a week when I was older, I’d have told them , “Yeah, right! Gag me with a spoon!” Then I would have danced around to the NKOTB which was perpetually emanating from my boombox.

In high school, things didn’t get much better. I stuck through gym for my freshman year, at which point we were given the choice of subbing in dance. Stunningly, while I possess the ability to trip over a cornflake and land flat on my face, I can hold my own in dance. Some might even call me graceful (thanks, Grandpa!) I loved dance, in all my black leather jazz shoe glory – except for my senior year when this bitch Krissy decided to make up a rumor that I was a slut and torment me in the dressing room. Mind you, I had never even had sex with a boy at the time – I did partake in my fair share of kissing, however – but I was still too young to embrace the S word and instead let her bully me. All 5’2” of her. I heard she got knocked up immediately following high school and dropped out of college. Sweet, sweet karma…you taste so good.

What are your memories of P.E.?

PS Thanks for the inspiration, Crabby!

A look inside recovery

Late last year, I was contacted by a young woman named Erin Pufunt, 22, a student who was about to celebrate her "Recovery Night" and wanted to invite me (I had previously interviewed some of her friends who make these fabulous "I am beautiful" shirts for Shape Magazine.) Unfortunately, I couldn't attend, but I invited Erin to answer a few questions about her struggle with anorexia for Weighting Game readers.

Well, two months, a bout of Montezuma's and a numb thumb later, here I am, tail tucked, finally posting Erin's brave and inspiring words. Erin, I'm so sorry it took me this long but I know readers will appreciate your honesty and willingness to share such intimate details. Much success in your continued recovery.

Love,
Leslie

Can you tell me a bit about your struggle? When did it start? What was one of your lowest points or hardest struggles?
"My eating disorder stemmed from an enormous lack of self worth and from having the need to control my ever changing environment. I began using ed behaviors when I was 13 and found the irony of anorexia in high school....that I was using my eating disorder to control my life but I had zero control over my eating disorder. I am a domestic abuse and rape survivor, and my lowest point came from a snowball of trauma and the self hatred I developed from my eating disorder. On June 15, 2006, I experienced a psychotic break and attempted suicide. I don't think there is a lower point than knowing, without ambivilence, that you are about to end your own life."

How did you ultimately get help?
"My best friends are my angels. They looked into treatment facilities for me and after months of my refusing to go they told me we were going to a purse party. Instead, we pulled into Linden Oaks (a hospital in the Chicago suburbs) where they had scheduled an assessment for me. I was admitted impatient the next day."

Do you believe people can fully recover from an eating disorder or is it more like alcoholism (ie you can stop the dangerous behavior but the disease is always a part of you)?
"I absolutely believe that full recovery from an eating disorder is possible. Eating disorders are comparred to drug addiction/alcoholism alot in the sense that addiciton is addiction....but the difference is that you aren't trying to 'not touch' the food in ed recovery...you are learning to not use food to cope with your feelings. And once you learn how to cope in healthy ways and not mask your feelings, the behaviors just seem to fall into place. I am so much more than an eating disorder."

Can you describe the pressure today's young women face to look a certain way?
"From classmates...advertising..society? This is something that I have had to really look at in my recovery. I struggled with severe body image distortion and I do blame most of that on society. I am completely addicted to fashion and couture fashion magazines...and to me, the bodies in those pictures were not unreasonable standards...they were simply how I 'should' look. Now I know that society's measure of beauty will only change if WE, as society, WANT to see a change."

What is a "Recovery Night"?
"Recovery night is held by ANAD (the National Association of Anorexia Nervose and Associated Disorders) the first Monday of every month at Linden Oaks. Someone who has been doing well in recovery is asked to tell their story and then answer quetions that people might have. It is a night used to inspire people to recover and to reassure them that full recovery is possible."

What kind of information do you want to spread to other women?
"I have so much to say to other women! I think most importantly, that you have the power to define beauty and to know that loving and accepting who you are and being confident in that is more beautiful than anything you could ever see on a runway."

What are your goals in life (career-wise)?
"I want to be on Broadway! Its' been my dream since I was little and I'm not ready to let that go. I would also really like to get into plus-sized modeling...anything that gets me in the public eye and gives me the power to spread my message of health, happiness, and life!"

You go, girl! Best of luck and keep on inspiring!

Dieting: It don't matter if you're black or white. Or does it?

A new study from the University of Iowa is framing fad diets as a race-related issue. Check this out:

Researchers reviewed over 400 articles published between 1984 and 2004 in "black" magazines Ebony, Jet, Essence, and "mainstream" magazines Good Housekeeping, Better Homes and Gardens, and Ladies' Home Journal. What they found: "African-American women's magazines are more likely to encourage fad diets and reliance on faith to lose weight, while mainstream women's magazines focus more on evidence-based diet strategies," according to a university press release. By "fad diets," they mean programs such as Atkins, Hilton Head, South Beach, the Dick Gregory Bahamian Diet or anything that promotes a quick fix. "Mainstream magazines" were found to offere more strategies per article than "African-American magazines". And, while mainstream magazines increased fitness and nutrition coverage during the second decade as the severity of the obesity epidemic unfolded, African-American magazines did not.

One of the researchers, Shelly Campo, has been quoted as saying that pretty much any diet, be it a no-carb countdown or a hi-fiber frenzy, is ultimately doomed to fail because they tend to overly rely on individual accountability (ie self-control, self-efficacy, etc) and gloss over external factors.

Before you balk at the apparent knock on personal responsibility, hear her out.

The key phrase here is external factors. These include environmental issues, socioeconomic circumstances and more. And as Campos says (and the entire field of public health in general believes), "We blame individuals too much for circumstances that are not entirely within their control. We know people living in unsafe neighborhoods are much less likely to exercise. And fast food is cheap compared to fresh fruit and vegetables. To tell a poor person that they made a bad choice because they couldn't afford the salad fixings raises some ethical concerns."

Surely, this is potential egg-shell territory, but I think it's important to discuss. Women and men (be they black, white, hispanic, asian, etc) living in lower socioeconomic neighborhoods ARE at a disadvantage. A quick spin through Cabrini Green here in Chicago (and yes, I do travel there - the area has become increasingly gentrified and just one main street, which I often drive on, divides condemned project housing and brand spanking new yuppie condos) reveals fast food shacks everywhere. People hanging out on the street corners, cop cars constantly cruisng the area, and not an apple tree or neon Subway sign in sight. How can people be expected to incorporate dark, leafy greens and organic pasta into their diets if none exists? What if the electricity has been turned off or a mother or father is unemployed and it's jjust flat-out cheaper and easier to buy fried chicken nuggets from a dollar menu than to splurge on berries and tuna? In contrast, go to any financially well-off area and you can't even walk two steps without tripping over a Whole Foods or bumping into a hot new gym.

Now, the issue that some people might have is the U. of Iowa researchers's linking of being African-American with living in a poor area. This, of course, is not a clear-cut issue. Also, I don't think that "low-income" individuals are necessarily spending their extra money on $4 magazines. But the attention being paid to environment is a good jumping-off point for discussions about ways to improve quality of life for people of any color, so they are able to have access to wholesome, nutritious foods and can exercise safely.

(Also, I know I may be biased towards the fab publications I write for, but is Better Homes/Gardens really considered "mainstream"? What about Cosmo or Glamour or mags you see at every checkout line?)

Campo, in her study, advocates public health efforts such as making farmers market items available to those living in poorer neighborhoods. Other options I can think of include community monitoring to boost safety; weekly basketball nights or walking trips, supervised by respected neighborhood leaders, an elected official or even a police officer; and major retailers stepping up and buiding their grocery stores in these areas.

I'm not saying individual responsibility is unimportant. Not at all - I think we all need to take ownership of our health. That said, imagine living your whole life in an area where you've been raised on fried food, where ketchup is considered a vegetable, where people routinely get mugged or robbed outside your door or where college is just a dream. Such an upbringing - regardless of your race - predisposes you to unhealthy decision-making.

Now, consider this question which an excellent jezebel.com article posed: Three-quarters of African-American women are considered overweight or obese, compared to one-third of all U.S. women. Whose job is it to help fix the problem? The government, the community, or the magazine industry?

Looking forward to your input!

www.target.bomb

Look at this ad.

WTF?

I just don't understand how ads like these make it through numerous levels of consideration and approval. I mean, did not one person think, "Hmm...it looks like her vagina is placed directly in the middle of a gigantic bullseye"? Did no one wonder aloud, "Ya know, I get the whole 'snow angel' angle but maybe aiming the lens directly at the center of her spread eagled legs is not the smartest choice"? Really - nobody?

Keep in mind that bullseyes are used for freaking target practice (no pun int.) with rifles.

What are you thoughts on this ad?

Gwyenth: Just because you named you daughter Apple doesn't mean that's all you can eat

Not sure if you've heard the news but last night, Gwynnie Paltrow was admitted to Mount Sinai Hospital due to an "unknown" illness. According to Us Weekly, bastion of all things accurate and thoroughly researched, "She was slumped over in a wheelchair pushed by [husband] Chris Martin."

BUT!!!

Some key info came just hours later with a bag of something was delivered to Paltrow's hom from a place called Organic Avenue. Herbs? Eco-friendly cleansing products? Life Froce Sun Flax All Raw Natural Italian Bread from the "Farmacy"? NY Magazine snooped around - well, they picked up the phone and called Organic Avenue (located at the corner of Delicious Drive and Overpried Place) - and were told by an employee that, "She's doing our five-day live-food fast."

Interesting.

So, the already-thin nymph who named her boy after the man who parted the Red Sea (yay for the Israelites!) is on a fast and was seen crumpled over in a wheelchair? That is so bizarre!

In all fairness, the Organic Avenue worker, appropriately named "Sprout McGee," told NY Mag that this fast icludes lots of juices and even SALAD! Thank God for small favors. Or, rather, thank Moses.

Anyhow, G. Pal is home now and on the mend. Whether fasting landed her in the hospital or some other serious health problem (which I truly don't intend to make fun of), we'll never know. But if the question keeps you up late at night, go eat some raw macadamia nuts and a glass of warm Coconut Mylk and simmer down, Buttercup.

Depressing press release of the day

Because everyone should resolve to Lipodissolve...

To: Leslie Goldman

For Immediate Release
Contact: XXX XXXXX
(818) XXX-XXXX

MEDIA ALERT

Resolve to be Healthy from Head to Toe this New Year

(Beverly Hills, Calif., [Leslie: "Of course!!"]-- January 9, 2008) This New Year turn to the experts for tips on looking your best and staying healthy, from head to toe. Whether it is a stunning smile, erasing a year's worth of wrinkles, smoothing out your post-holiday shape or caring for your back, these doctors have the keys to a Happy New Year.

This year resolve to keep your teeth clean, bacteria-free mouth with the latest dental technology. Dr. XX YYY, a cosmetic dentist in Beverly Hills, Calif., is using the high resolution, state-of-the-art Trinocular Compound Microscope on all his dental patients. This system allows the patient, dentist and hygienist to digitally view the number and types of bacteria in the mouth with a fast, painless test. By using the microscope, Dr. Y can identify certain types of bacteria that can cause gum disease, and letting them go undetected can lead to periodontal issues Catching these issues early is the best the outcome for the patient, because, if left untreated, gum disease can lead to patients losing their teeth. (Leslie: OK, this one could be helpful. But wait...)

Is your New Year’s resolution to face 2008 without a wrinkle? Then, the new injectable fillers like Radiesse, Juvederm, and Perlane might be the answer. With non-surgical procedures becoming increasingly popular in the United States, Dr. 90210’s Dr. O FFFF a facial and reconstructive plastic surgeon at Spalding Drive Plastic Surgery and Dermatology in Beverly Hills, California, has tips on facing the New Year with a few less frown lines and crow’s feet. Plus, learn some of Hollywood’s celebrity secrets for looking your best, from the latest in laser treatments to the best lip enhancers to make you red-carpet ready in minutes instead of months.

(Leslie: Now, the press release heads back to a truly health-inspired option, so kudos here:) Before heading to the slopes or out in the cold, be sure to take care of your back. With more than 500,000 winter sports injuries a year, Dr. B CC, Clinical Professor of Orthopedic Surgery at University of California at Irvine Medical Center wants you to avoid starting the year in traction. The spine surgeon offers simple tips for watching your back this winter for example, when hitting the slopes, take a ski or snowboarding lesson from a qualified instructor. Learning how to fall correctly can help you can reduce the risk of injury. Ice or rain can cause serious falls, be sure to wear proper shoes or boots in wet weather. If you do slip or fall, then try to fall on your side or buttocks and roll over naturally by turning your head in the direction of the roll.

(Leslie: Only to wind up with this gem of a New Year's resolution:) After all the holiday feasting, it can be an easy resolution to have liposuction for a quick, new you in 2008. But, Dr. A BBBB, a liposuction expert at Spalding Drive Plastic Surgery and Dermatology, has the skinny on the top five myths (and truths) about liposuction. From the new LipoDissolve and Mesotherapy procedures, to the best, and worst, candidates for liposuction procedures, Dr. BBBB extensive background in body contouring may have you rethinking your new shape for the New Year.

Red meat, ice cream and eggs, oh my!

Check out this article from Health on how some foods, commonly regarded as crappy for you, can actually be healthy. Women who lick up at least one serving of full-fat dairy products a day gain less weight than women who don't? Bring it on, Cold Stone!

Three out of five Spice Girls…

…have now spoken outwardly about their battle with eating disorders.

Posh Spice broke her silence in 2001, when an excerpt of her autobiography was published in the British newspaper The Mail. In it, she said that she had been "obsessed" with her appearance and that "in the gym, instead of checking my posture or position, I was checking the size of my bottom, or to see if my double chin was getting any smaller.”

Although she had been accused (why people “accuse” others of an eating disorder, I just don’t get – accusations are for crimes, not psychiatric issues) of being anorexic for many years – and she still is – the future Mrs. Victoria Beckham (*sigh*) engaged in not just calorie restriction but binge-eating, over-exercising and liquid meal replacements. The last two dieting mechanisms were taught to her by songmates Geri Haliwell/Sexy Spice and Mel C./Sporty Spice. Sounds like these girls were under a wee too much stress, no?

Recently, Geri and Melanie, part of the current superhot Spice Girls reinvention, have opened up about their personal struggles with bulimia. All of this, they say, chaos occurred at the height of their fame.

In a recent TV documentary about the ladies who taught us to scream, “I’ll tell you what I want, what you really, really want!” Sporty revealed, “My biggest, biggest fear and it made me feel nauseous just thinking about it was that the papers were going to say I’d put on weight. All through the Spice Girls I was terribly in control of what I was eating. I wasn’t eating properly and I was over exercising. I was very skinny. I found having an eating disorder really embarrassing.”

Keep in mind this was SPORTY Spice – she was “supposed” to have an athletic, fit body. Of any of the Girls, she should have been made to feel especially good about having strength and ripped arms. Instead, the limelight got to her and she felt so pressured to be skinny, she actually started throwing up from it.

Some of the other Spice Girls knew about the disordered behavior but kept mum. Says Scary in the new documentary, “Even though we were that close, there were certain things you just don’t talk about unless you feel there’s a window in there.”

This reminds me of the US Weekly column “Celebrities – They’re Just Like Us!" So many women remain silent, even when their closest friends stop eating, run for hours, drink to excess or start cutting themselves. Celebrity or not. But all of these harmful actions are mechanisms for gaining control over an overwhelming amount of stress and if you see someone you care for hurting themselves, you need to say something. It's like that anti-drug commercial where one girl stands on a pier and watches as her friend gasps for air, drowning in the lake. You would never stand idly by then...so why do we so frequently turn the other cheek when a friend is bingeing, purging, starving or overdosing at the gym? I know there have been times when I stayed silent for too long because I was afraid my friend would take offense. But now I know how to speak up in a loving, supportive, non-confrontational way.

That said, we can't make it our total responsibility to stage an A&E Intervention when an adult has decided not to heed our concerns. At some point, a grown woman can't be told what she needs to do - she'll get help for her ED when she is good and ready to. I've witnessed this in girlfriends and in myself, too.

Sorry - this post started out all "Girl Power!" and ended up Debbie Downer. Wa-waahhh.

Gee I’m glad it’s raining…

...so no one can see my brace.

Yes, I’m sitting in a NYC Starbucks, it’s pouring out, and I’m rocking a sweet gray ACE Bandage wrist brace from Duane Reade. Maybe you’ve heard of him? He showed at Bryant Park last Spring with Donatella Versace. Yes, that Duane Reade. I look very cool. Which is good because I’m in the Garment District, surrounded by models and fashion-forward, chic peeps dressed in head-to-toe black. But none of them have an arm brace! Losers! (Maybe they think I’m super trendy, following new, bizarro Japanese Kegadoru phenom?)

I just had lunch with my two iVillage editors, Michelle and Valerie. Sushi, hugs, and great conversation. So nice to put a face to the name of someone you email everyday, you know?

Yesterday and today, I’ve been meeting with my editors from Health, Women’s Health, Self and Huffington Post – always a treat for me :-) Last night I tucked into some Vietnamese food for my first time ever (note to Saigon Grille: “very dirty martini" does not mean “straight vodka”.) Pinkberry has graced my palate twice so far. And now, in Starbucks, I’m trying out a new drink – the Skinny Latte. If you’ve stopped into your local java-infused crack house lately, you’ve no doubt seen them advertised – 90 calories, nonfat and with ample calcium. I made mine Mocha, which I’ve never tried before (Here’s how the convo with the barista went: Me: “How does the Skinny Mocha Latte taste?” Skinny, goateed barista: “Good, except for the “skinny” part.” Umm…way to sell the product, dude!)

I think I got a few too many pumps of mocha, though, and they forgot the espresso, because damn, this tastes like warm chocolate milk and it’s time for Leslie to go sleepy-pie… Still, lots of women are ordering skinnies and it does feel oddly virtuous and exhilarating to order it.

On the other hand, I know some body image/weight loss bloggers are perturbed by the use of the term "skinny" as a drink label. Take this excerpt from a letter written by an actual barista on Starbucks Gossip:

"It is politically incorrect. Should we start calling drinks with 2% or whole milk and regular syrups 'Fat' or 'Obese?' Consider what customers on line waiting for their turn to order their drink will think if they hear the drink before them being called out as 'Skinny.' It leaves the door open for the next person on line to be offended. Additionally, the word 'skinny' itself can have many different interpretations, not all of which are positive. In today's society, the term 'skinny' often refers to a person who is considered TOO thin or unhealthy looking. People will not want to order a drink with a name that they associate with an unhealthy appearance."

Tell me what you think. Is calling a latte "skinny" upsetting to you? A marketing ploy? Or is that taking the issue too seriously? Remember, the other sizes are "Tall," "Grande" and "Venti."

"Y'all fat, and y'all eat too much."

That's what Louisiana resident Ricky Labit says he was told by a waitress at the all-u-can-eat Manchuria Restaurant as she handed him a check for double the normal amount.

Labit is 6'3" and weighs 265 pounds. He's a regular at the restaraunt and became agitated and upset when the bill for $46.40, almost double the buffet price for two adults, was handed to him and his cousin, who weighs a bit more. (A Manchuria Restaurant spokesperson denies the claim.)

Well guess what? I think I'd become agitated and upset, too, if an establishment so blatantly discriminated against my size. Or if an airline charged me double the normal ticket price for a seat because of my size. I don't weigh 265, but I'm almost 6 feet tall - clearly it takes more food and drink to fill up (in the literal sense) that frame versus my mom's petite 5'3". Should I pay more than her? It probably takes a larger dose of certain medications to effect heavier people than thinner. Should pharma companies be charging more?

If this whole "you ate too many crab legs" incident really did go down as diescribed in Louisiana, I have to call size discrimination. It's called "All You Can Eat," owners! My metabolical marvel of a husband takes advantage of this at churrascaria Fogo de Chao (on the rare occasions we go) and he's never been asked to pay $160 instead of the already-exorbitant $80 price. And trust me, the man can scarf his weight in filet and bacon-wrapped chicken.

Then again, people of size (tall or petite, heavy or busty, Size 11 or toddler-like shoe size) often have to shop at specialty stores for clothing, and those prices can be inflated. Where to draw the line between size discrimination and facing reality?

PS I wrote this whole thing with one hand - woke up with a freaking nasty case of sudden-onset carpal tunnel and my left thumb has less feeling than Ann Coulter.

Blogging 'bout boobs

Boobs are everywhere - confronting me in magazines, staring at me from the TV, taunting me from giant billboards. But 99% of the time*, the images we see are those of surgically-enhanced or otherwise-altered breasts. How can the everyday woman know what the real deal looks like if "the norm" is a 36DD augmentation? (Other than spend five years in a locker room, interviewing people, of course. But I'm a freak.)

So, I present to you this Not Safe For Work (but totally non-sexual ) website which presents real women and real breasts in all their glory.

At first, you may think some of these chests look strange - one woman's leftie doesn't match her rightie; another has ski slopes despite two pregnancies; another has nipples the size of silver dollar pancakes. Well guess what, world? That's normal!!! We women are like beautiful snowflakes (*gag*) - different and unique in our own way. We've simply been conditioned to expect Playboy, when the reality is more National Geographic.

Enjoy - you may find yourself looking for a long while. Just warning ya.

* I made up this statistic

This is why I like George Clooney

When asked what he thought about the news of Nicole Kidman's confirmed pregnancy, George Clooney told People Magazine, "She'll be a perfect mother. She'll be great. She'll be a tall mother."

I'm sorry but that just made me laugh out loud.

Fun tips from the blogosphere

My fellow body image/fitness/weight loss bloggers have been writing up a storm on some fun, funky and sad topics so I've rounded a handful up for you to munch on:

1) Workout Mommy offers this awesome tip for a portable, fun workout which I am TOTALLY going to try in NYC this week. Here's what you do:

Get a deck of cards and decide how many you want to use. Here are the guidelines:

Beginner exercisers, start with 5 cards
Moderate exercisers, start with 10 cards
Advanced exercisers, start with 20 cards
The truly hardcore, go for 30 or more cards

Now, shuffle those babies and get ready. Red cards are jumping jacks; Black cards are push-ups; Face cards equals 10; Aces are high (equals 11!) So, Workout Mommy explains, for every card that you pull, do the specific exercise and number that corresponds with the card. For example:

Red 9 = 9 jumping jacks
Black 4= 4 push ups
Red 2 = 2 jumping jacks

Love it! Now you can play solitaire and tone your glutes, all in the comfort of your hotel room! Throw in an exercise band and jumprope and you're good to go.

2) Crabby McSlacker of Cranky Fitness fame posted about these insane survey results, from 1,000 women you opened up to Fitness Magazine :

85% of women said they'd be willing to have an extra toe to keep pounds off
23% would shave their heads
Almost 50% would rather lose 20 pounds than live to be a hundred
Nearly 25% would go to jail for a week to reach their ideal weight.

What? Risking incarceration, longevity and polydactyly (look it up) to shed a few pounds? This says a lot.

3) Comrade GoGo reminisced about the many gyms she's belonged to over the years and indecision which faces her everytime renewal rolls around. I've been going through the same angel/devil discussion myself, though for different reasons: My gym is falling apart at the beams, with water leaks, broken ice machines and (today at least) a locker room so hot it bordered on sauna temperature (true, it's unseasonably warm in Chicago and it might be hard to quickly flip the switch on the AC in a huge three-story gym) but come on - I'm paying you a crapload of dough. The least you can do is have a towel boy fan me as I ellipticize. Still, I feel a strange dedication to My Gym (maybe it's because they let the Today Show crew take over the locker room for an afternoon in June of 2006 when my book was being featured. That was nice. But Natalie Morales gave them a shout-out - ie free national advertising - so technically they owe me.

4) FitSugar has a fun survey on eats and treats at the movies. It turns out pickles (?!?!) are a common theater treat in some parts of the country. Huh? Personally, I could go swimming in a pool full of hot, overly salted movie popcorn, it's so delicious, but I don't order it because It can clearly envision each kernel clogging up my arteries just after slciking some buttery oil on my thighs. So my husband gets it and I mooch off him.

5) Over the past week, Back in Skinny Jeans has been blogging in a very raw and honest way about her recent bulimia relapse following two breakups (one with her longterm boyfriend, another with a business partner). I applaud her ability to speak her mind and air her aching heart - she is proof that we can't be perfect all the time, or even half the time - and that what kills us makes us stronger. I'm so glad her readers are supporting her so wholeheartedly. I know I do.

Effed-up ad

I was all set to write about this so-sad-it's-silly article in the current weight loss-themed US Weekly, titled, "You did what to get ready?" (Sample: "I was on the treadmill 24/7 for a week, then a super-crash diet for the next six days." - singer Christina Milian.) But then I closed the magazine to be confronted with an ad so insidiously vile and demeaning, I had to focus on it. (Unfortunately, I can't find a link on the Web - if you can, please post!)

The advert features three women clad in skimpy, gold lame bikinis and stilettos, plus one man sporting a banana hammock. The guy and one of the chicks are front and center, in an intimate pose, with him dangling grapes above her lips. Flanking the It couple on either side are two Maxim-esque woman (large breasts; long, lean torsos with a verticle line down the middle; impossibly thin legs). They look frightened. Scared. Upset.

Hmmm...I wonder why. Is it because someone has taken a black Sharpie to their bodies, marking them up like pieces of meat? The women have had the "fat" circled on their outer thighs. Large Xs mark their lower abs. Dotted circles and arrows grace their foreheads.

W. T. F? Is this a fitness ad, a call for plastic surgery, or a football play diagram?

Not motivating, not inspiring, not likely I'll ever visit an Equinox gym

Have you seen it? It's quite slick so you may have tossed it aside without noticing the grossness.

PS The title is "Happily ever...What's your after?"

"Om" your way to better body image

I don't know about you, but when I emerge from my Sunday afternoon power yoga class, I always feel emtoionally cleansed and physically invigorated. Even though I can't do a headstand to save my life, the 90-minute session makes me feel strong and proud of what my bod can do.

As it turns out, I'm on to something. Beverly Price, RD, a Michigan-based exercise physiologist and Registered Yoga Teacher, is nationally recognized for approaching body image/ED problems with both nutrition counseling and yoga. I actually met Beverly over a year ago when, after reading Locker Room Diaries, she contacted me and we met for tea at a local Starbucks. Warm, open and full of energy, she explained some of research and theories to me and I was really intrigued.

She recently reached out again to let me know about a new program she's spearheading called Reconnect With Food and I wanted to tell you about it. Read on for our e-interview! Make sure to check out her suggestion for a yoga position we can all try to feel happier and healthier.

How are our mind and body disconnected when it comes to food?

"The dieting industry has reduced our food supply to fat grams, calories, units, and numbers versus wholesome and nutritional choices. Our culture has become so obsessed with the latest and greatest diet, that individuals have lost the innate ability to choose foods in their highest good. So many individuals rely on a piece of paper—a menu or “meal plan” to solve their deepest emotional attachments. Individuals turn towards or away from food to numb painful emotions. Over the decades, the pendulum has swung from low-fat to high-protein instead of a middle ground of balanced choices...your body has a built-in sensor that knows what kinds of nutrients you are eating. When you feed your body natural, wholesome foods, its needs are satisfied. When you feed your body processed foods and other fat-free junk, it doesn’t sense any nutrients coming in. It then urges you to continue eating and you cannot stay in touch with true hunger and fullness signals. If you can become aware of these innate signals, then you can rely on yourself to make connected choices versus relying on an external source to determine when to start and when to stop eating."

Where does yoga come into play?

"Yoga has many parallels and metaphors such as:

* Delaying of "impulse control"-- the ability to feel an urge and delay acting on it, especially when individuals are in yoga poses that are intense or awkward. Individuals learn to tolerate uncomfortable emotional states without running to grab food that they are not hungry for.

* Individuals begin to enjoy their body for the first time. Teachers encourage those who have focused solely on their body’s outer appearance to notice inner qualities instead. In yoga, students are encouraged to let go of competition with themselves and others.

* For many people, part of maintaining weight loss is learning to tune in to the body's subtle signals of hunger and satiety. Eating only when hungry and stopping when the body is satisfied will result in the body slowly returning to its natural set point weight. However, most people who have attempted to control their weight through dieting are too fearful to allow themselves to decide when and how much to eat. They literally don't trust their bodies. Yoga can help those with eating disorders or disordered eating trust their bodies.

* The physical discomfort of overeating becomes more obvious, as yoga creates an awareness that makes all sensations more apparent. This can make it easier for eating disordered individuals to choose to stop eating before the point of physical discomfort.

* Yoga teaches mindfulness. To truly enjoy a food, one must eat it mindfully, paying attention to its taste, texture, and other sensual qualities. Eating a small amount of food mindfully is much more satisfying than eating lots of food without paying attention."

Can you tell us a bit about your own struggles with food and body image? How did this impact your decision to work in the mind-body arena?

"Throughout my eating disorder career, I went from anorexia to bulimia to binge eating—yep—I did it all. In the short time that I spent in conventional therapy post-college, I learned that I could talk my way out of feeling. In yoga, I learned how to get in touch with what was deep inside. Through yoga through the study of Kabbalah and Essence Repatterning, I was able to heal on a soul level. Through much inner work, I learned that my relationship with food paralleled so many other relationships in my life—money, relationships with others, work, etc.

My interest in nutrition actually stemmed from my competitive swimming days and wanting to open up a practice in sports nutrition. I wanted to be as far away from “eating disordered patients” as possible as they struck a nerve. For a long time, I was in denial about my eating disorder. The more I shunned this population, the more they came to my practice in droves. I never felt that I was truly helping others until I went through Yoga Teacher Training and began to apply my yoga teaching to eating disorder recovery. I found that yoga was the 'missing link' to eating disorder recovery."

"Incorporating yoga into my private nutrition practice encompasses not just yoga postures but the philosophy and ancient teachings of yoga. I developed the Reconnect with Food programs, for individuals and groups, as a systematic way of healing mind, body and soul—the element that is missing from most recovery programs. My recent DVD, to be released mid to late February--Reconnect with Food …unplugged, offers an hour of yoga incorporating storytelling and metaphors, coupled with a group discussion of 'real' participants from my practice who share their parallels with food and its relationship with so many of their struggles in life. Viewers can practice the yoga flow on the screen, while taking notes during discussion. By participating in this DVD, viewers can uncover their attachments and learn what they are truly “hungry” for in life. Most importantly, my clients—whether local or long distance telephone clients—know that I am real. I have been there, done that and am a survivor. And, my clients know that there is no end point to recovery as in conventional therapy. Recovery, just like yoga, is an infinite journey. Through much inner work, I learned that my relationship with food paralleled so many other relationships in my life-money, relationships with others, work, etc. I now have a healthy relationship with food."

Can you offer Weighting Game readers a special pose we might try to get in touch with our feelings about our body?

YOGA POSE TO HELP PROMOTE CHANGE FROM WITHIN-- Bow Pose (Dhanurasana)

• Lie face down with your forehead against the floor. Gently fold your legs toward your hands as you reach back to grasp each ankle with the corresponding hand. Your knees and feet are apart.
• Inhale and raise your head, chest, and thighs, arching your back and stretching up. Keep your elbows straight. Press your legs into your hands, lifting the lower half of the body, while arching up with your head, neck and chest. You are balancing on your abdomen.
• Open your chest, relax the muscles along your spine, and look up.
• Keep an awareness of lengthening your spine and abdominal area. Continue for 15 - 20 seconds.

Namaste.

Back from the bowels of hell

Just keeping you all up to date on my gastrointestinal issues, which have been truly stimulating (to say the least) over the past week and I know are at the forefront of all your pretty minds.

While in Puerta Vallarta, some nasty little bacteria decided my stomach seemed like a sweet pad to chill at (in all fairness, it is a nice stomach. *blush*). The result: A mild case of Moctezuma's Revenge, also called, Montezuma's Revenge or, as I affectionately refer to it, "The Reason I Will Never %&*!ng Return To Mexico." It's estimated that 40% of all foreign travellers who vaycay in Mexico are saddled by the bacterial infection and considering the fact that four of the 10 of our family wound up puking/pooping copious amounts, I'd say Wikipedia's estimate is right on freaking target. And it's not like we stayed at a youth hostel or ate live catfish we found swimming in a gutter somewhere - we stayed at a very posh resort, drank lots of bottled water and while we did partake in ice cubes and salad rinsed in hotel H2O, we were constantly swilling and alcohol and I could have sworn that I learned in graduate school that vodka kills 99% of all bacteria. Bah!

The badness ran its course in about four days but suffice it to say, I spent the better part of that alternating between zoning out to Project Runway marathons and racing to the bathroom, cursing in Spanish. And I don't even speak Spanish.

A strange theory did enter my mind while sick and I wanted to run it by all of you - or at least, the three of you have continued reading despite the gross nature of this blog. Here's what I was thinking: I was on vacation, chowing on foods I don't normally eat. Greasy chips, still glistening with warm oil. Spicy guacamole. Fish carpaccio. Daquiries. Real chocolate ice cream. You get the point. After five days of such gastronomic indulgence, I started feeling bad. Soon followed by a feeling of complete and total emptiness. All I could eat for the last two days was crackers and even those made me cramp up like a premenstrual 15-year-old. Thank God for Pepto capsules (I absolutely detest the chewable pink chalkiness of the tablets. Even if they are pink). Without them, I never would have survived the plane ride home. As a sidenote, noise-cancelling headphones would've been fab considering the two dolphin-like children who squaled and sqwaked non-stop for four hours.

So I'm thinking, even though the obvious answer is that a bug invaded my system, do you think there's an possibility that perhaps my body was so perplexed by the different foods being introduced in such rapid-fire succession, it decided to send a major "Chillax" message to me by forcing it all out? Or is this just delusional thinking?

On an obnoxiously positive note, my abs were way flat and sunkissed tan for those four days of toilet-hopping. Gotta look for the silver lining in these things, right?

Breaking body image news: Kim Kardashian edition

Breaking news, everyone! Kim Kardashian told People Magazine that her 2008 New Year's resolution is to boost her eating habits. Step Number One?

No more deep-fried oreos.

Ah...the problems of the rich and borderline-famous. It must be very, very hard.

Hope this doesn't mean the end of her famous boo-tay.

Thanks for the tip-off, FitSugar!

My interview on This Waif Cooks

Hey all, just wanted to let you know that WG reader/aspiring chef/blogger Hungry Waif contacted me to answer a few questions and she graciously posted them on her web site. You can see my answers here or here, at Nutritious Junk - the latter has lots of other interesting, food-related posts, too.

A couple of the quirky Qs she asked me:

Q: Do you have a favorite food product (for example, not "eggs" but rather "kashi go lean" or "garden burgers")?

A: "Are you asking me which items I'd like to be a corporate sponsor for? I have no shame, so here are a handful of namebrand items I eat almost everyday:

Honey Bunches of Oats Cereal
Progresso Lentil Soup
Luna Bars (lemon zest) and Kashi GoLean bars (chocolate pretzel)
Lifeway Low-fat Pomegranate Kefir
McDonalds Fruit and Yogurt Parfaits
Fake crab (brand unknown)
Diet A&W Root Beer; Sierra Mist Free
Cool Whip Lite
Cadbury Creme Eggs (once a year!)
Swiss Miss Hot Cocoa
Sour Patch Kids, Raisinettes"

Q: What's your food vice?
A: "Candy, chocolate, sugarsugarsugar. I am obsessed. It actually reached a point where, when working in an office environment a couple years ago, I would top off my healthy, oh-so-virtuous oatmeal and fruit breakfast with a handful of mini-Snickers and mini-1000 Grand bars. Just because they were there! My dentist has actually asked me to stop eating so much candy, which I kind of don't understand because doesn't that mean less work/money for him? Hmm...quandry."

PS - I JUST discovered Sugar Babies at Walgreens yesterday and can I just asked - what rock have I been living under? These things are insane! Why did no one inform me? Delicious, addictive...and very good for my molars, I'm sure.

Two, four, six, eight, Donna Martin graduate!

It's Saturday night. You're getting ready to hit the town with your girls in a few hours. Music is blasting as you do your makeup and your try not to smear your eyeliner as you sing along with Beyonce. You're feeling good from your afternoon workout and are hot to trot.

Then the question arises: What to eat for dinner?

If you eat too much, you'll feel overly full and bloated. If you don't eat enough, that margarita is going to hit your bloodstream faster than news of Jamie-Lynn's pregnancy hit the internet. What to do, what to do. Great taste or less fill?

If you opt to skip dinner entirely, and do so on a regular basis, you may suffer from...DRUNKOREXIA. (Not a DSM IV diagnosis, so don't even try for insurance coverage). The buzzword is all the rage these days and means that you purposefully cut back on calories so you can can drink more without gaining weight. A recent episode of The Morning Show with Mike and Juliet cited a report that shows 30% of women ages 18-23 hold off on the chicken breast and pasghetti so they can down lemon drops later on.

And all I have to say is, "Duh."

My friends and I totally did this in college - we considered it to be financially beneficial as well as calorically. I mean, an empty stomach means a faster buzz from that disgusting Long Island Iced Tea crap juice we used to guzzle (once we hit age 21, obviously), and a faster buzz meant less money spent on more drinks. We were, like, SO SMART! But we weren't considering the fact that booze is jacked up with empty calories (Everclear isn't exactly like red wine when it comes to antioxidants or heart health protection) and then, without fail, we would end up dialing Gumby's Pizza ... from a pay phone ... and ordering cheesy pepperoni rolls and garlic- and oil-slicked Pokey Sticks. Or we'd scarf down late-night Chinese food. Or, on especially ill-fated nights, we'd stop at a local chain known for "burritos as big as your head." That catchphrase doesn't exactly scream "Diet," does it?

Popular celeb drunkorexics seem to include Tara Reid, LiLo, and who can forget the infamous Beverly Hills 90210 episode when Donna Martin starved herself all day to squeeze into her mermaid-like prom dress, only to swizzle champagne at a preparty and get totally trashed in the limo. Aaron Spelling was really ahead of his time on this one.

Now that I'm older and anything more than a single stiff martini consitutes binge drinking for me, I admit that I still am cognizant of mixing grub with hooch. I don't carboload prior to heading out but I also don't hit the road on an empty tummy. Usually a can of soup and a wrap with melted cheese or something like that is the perfect amount. Also, I'm not big on drinking during meals, as it leaves me sleepy and prone to licking food off of stranger's plates, so if I'm out at a nice meal, I'll abstain.

I'll point out an oft-cited 2003 study in The Journal of Nutrition which showed that individuals who drink an average of a single drink per day have the lowest levels of abdominal fat. Those men and women who drank occasionally - but when they did, had four or more drinks in one sitting - had the greatest levels of tummy pudge. Now, I'm not telling y'all this as an excuse to start imbibing as sport. Just an interesting finding. But there's a very fine line between a lil tipple and boozing it up to the point where your inhibitions sink...and a beer gut, as the Skinny Bitches tell us, is disgusting, nasty, vile proof of our lack of willpower, charm and intelligence. So I say, if you drink a small glass of Merlot with dinner and that's it, good for you, oeniphile! If you've been posting pics on "Am I Wasted?" stop and take a look at yourself. You don't/shouldn't live life according to the Girls Gone Wild rulebook.

And remember - friends don't let friends drink and diet!

PS This is catty and wrong but I'd love to hear any stories you have of drunkarexia-gone-insane, maybe from your college days. I'm assuming if you're here and reading this blog, you made it through and lived to tell the story of that night you downed six Jello shots before a frat party and wound up puking lime green. Not that that happened to me or anything.

Thanks for nothing, Japan!

Sure, the country has given us Cup of Noodles, anime, Sudoku and countless regrettable tattoos, but really, Japan, what's up with this??

Apparently now, in Japan, if healthy, delicious, omega-3-rich sushi just seems too boring, you can stuff your trap with Pizza Hut Japan's Double Roll Pie. (See it here on the Japanese web site.) Please notice the crust made of bacon-wrapped mini-weiners; the tiny hamburger patties sprinkled across the pizza; the mounds of mozzrella, cheddar and parm cheese and pepperoni. At least there are soy beans and corn for our daily veggie fix!
FitSugar.com did a caloric breakdown and estimates the pie has 5,164 calories and 10,752g of sodium, which means a sngle slice has 646 calories and 1,344 mg of sodium. Barf. As if stuffed-crust izza wasn't bad enough.

I stumbled across the Pizza Hut Double Roll Pie while looking up the more recently introduced McDonald’s Japan Mega Mac. This four-patty burger is, in a word, insane. Can a non-porn star even get their mouth around all that meat? Gross. How long until we're eating this:

In other breaking Japanese-invention news, the Wall Street Journal (what, you thought I only read women's mags and Jezebel.com?) is reporting that one of Japan's largest makers of women's underwear, Wacoal, is now promoting a girdle...FOR MEN. The product, called the "ex walker," is essential super-stretchy underpants made of woven nylon and polyurethane that Wacoal says can actually tone the thighs and hips, versus the Spanx effect of sucking in and smoothing temporarily. Oh, and the girdle is being touted as a health-promoting product, not mere manly lingerie, which means it might even be eligible for insurance coverage.

That is just soooo 2007.

I mean, at the risk of buying into a possibly grossly overinflated and completely inaccurate stereotype...are there that many obese men buzzing around the downtown Tokyo business district? And, um, WTF is up with men's products being covered by insurance while women languish? Hello, Viagra?

Well, there is a legitimate health bent here: In Japan, the phrase "metabolic syndrome" is hot right now - everyone is concerned about the constellation of health factors, such as being overweight and having high blood-sugar levels, which can put a individual at risk for heart disease. Says the WSJ, according to a Japanese-government survey, 34% of men in their 40s were overweight in 2005, up from 21% in 1985, primarily due to increased meat and fat consumption (Pizza Hut weiner-burger-pie, anyone?) and a lack of exercise. With numbers like these, the government believes half of men between 40 and 74 either have or are at risk for metabolic syndrome. Looks like I don't know as much about Asian men's bodies as I thought.

With their ex walker, Wacoal is attempting to capitalize on the nation's fear of metabolic syndrome. Sure, wearing a girdle might net you some funny sidelong glances in the YMCA locker room, but isn't that better than (cue scary music)...DEATH?!

BTW is it just me or does this male girdle (mirdle?) remind anyone of Kramer's fabulous "Bro" man-bra from Seinfeld? I'm just saying...