Would you rather...(please answer!)

OK, this is going to sound like a bizarro, what-is-this-doing-on-Weighting-Game question, but homur me, please. It's for a higher purpose, I promise.

The Question:

If you had to choose, would you rather be

A) 40 pounds overweight and smart

OR

B) skinny, but unintelligent?

Please leave your answers in the coments section. And before you start typing, no, you cannot pick A and say "I'd be smart enough to hire a trainer and nutritionist." Just give me your gut answers along with any thoughts on the topic.

Thanks!

L

Today Show recap

Thanks for all of your positive comments, everyone - I had a wonderful time at the Today Show and wanted to give you a recap of events - some related to the segment and some totally inconsequential but interesting to me (you know, the one who tosses her hair - A LOT - on national TV):

Wednesday: Leave O'Hare and sleep for most of the ride. But with about 30 minutes to go, we hit major turbulence, which I fouhgt through by remembering that someone once told me to think of it as riding in a Jeep driving over a rocky road. I was OK but numerous people on the plane threw up and one woman even needed oxygen. Excitement!

I pushed passed all of them to catch my ride and make it to Babytalk Magazine, where I met with an editor who I love and assigned me this article on post-baby body image - cover story, baby! Also, check out the quiz (you can tell it's my writing by the humor, those of you who know me well) and register for the three-month challenge.

OK, enough of that. I met up with a close girlfriend of mine and we had dinner at my hotel - then I kicked her (cute) butt out and went over some of my notes while Top Chef played on the flatscreen.

Thursday: Woke up early to workout (which resulted in three very brown towels because I got a spray tan for the show - love you TanCun Salon! - so I would look nice and sun-kissed. Bonus: My hotel had a fabulous make-your-own bottled water feature in the hallway - you grab an empty, new plastic bottle, fill with water and repeat. Not terribly eco-friendly but could be worse.!

After I got dressed, I walked through Rockerfeller Plaza to the show. Passed The Donald (yes, his hair looks like that) and Al Roker. Was ushered into the Green Room (not really green, but has great fruit and mini-donuts) and met Ashley Fillip, the other woman who was on the show with me. You can learn about her story here or on the actual Today Show clip. Oh, wait - nix that - we met while getting our hair done. We learned that we have a crazy among of things in common:

- Both tall (yay!).
- Belonged to the same sorority but on different campuses.
- Nutrition backgrounds (BS for me; she's getting her Masters).
- Grew up five minutes apart in suburban Chicago.
- She's read Locker Room Diaries!
- Both got spray tans before appearing
- Her fiance lives a block away from me and has the same job as my dad - food broker - which is (a) a very uncommon job and (b) interesting that she and I both have male figures in our lives whose work is based on food.

We met the producer, Vivian, who I lovelovelove and actually worked with on my first Today Show appearance when my book came out. She led us into a muy bright studio with a test kitchen attached. There were lots of men and one woman (named Leslie!) And...Ann Curry was in the house! Gorgeous. Three high chairs (not highchairs) were set up and Ashley sat in the middle of NBC anchor Hoda Kotb and I.

The segment itself went very smoothly - I feel like both Ashley and I were given the opportunity to speak our minds and we each got to make salient points. One really good moment, I thought, was when Hoda asked Ashley when her turning point was. She spoke of not remembering her college graduation because she was in such a fog and that's when she knew she needed help. What an eye-opener. As for me, I like the point my brother made - I was able to mention the words "thong," "cocaine" and "Girls Gone Wild" on national TV and still come off sounding intelligent. My job there was done.

After the segment, we hugged and chatted a bit in the hallway. Matt Lauer passed by, eating some Raisin Bran (He's Just Like US!) Also? Surprisingly thin. Probably because they're all on the move from 3am on.

Afterwards, my amazon.com ranking of LRD went from around 200,000 to 14,000, so that was fab! I visited some other friends, family and editors, bought the most delish dark chocolate-covered raisins and super-soft Swedish Fish, and my friend and I ordered in sushi and Pinkberry.

The last bit of fun drama to cap off the trip? My flight out of Laguardia proceeded as follows:

1) My 8am flight was canceled but I received no call or email. Boo.

2) They put me on a 10am flight, even though that would have made me miss my connecting flight (on another airlines) to Detroit.

3) I hightail it through security (with a 4.5 oz bottle of lotion! Ha!) and make it onto a 7am flight. Sweet.

4) At 7:15, the pilot announces that The. Wing. Is. Broken. and we're waiting for a part. Could be an hour.

5) At 7:30, the pilot says, "Oh, BTW the part is en route from DC and should be here in 3 hours.' Mild chaos ensues. We deplane.

6) I sit in line for eons to rebook. I fight for my right to party in Michigan but they don't care.

7) Bitch, bitch, bitch. Repeat.

8) Miraculously, a seat on the 'totally booked' 9am flight opens for me. I think they just wanted to get rid of me. But I was being nice compared to other people - men were literally SCREAMING "United f&^$ing sucks." It was crazy.

I am now safe and sound in Detroit with Dan and his family. Gotta rest up because guess what? The Today Show invited me back next week for another segment - I'll be on Wednesday! Details to come.

xoxoxoxo

The next time I'm feeling sorry for myself...

I'm going to re-watch this YouTube video of Dustin Carter. The 18-year-old high school wrestler lost all four limbs after contracting a blood disease at age 5 (a portion of his arms and upper legs remain). Obstacle? To be sure. Life-ending? No way. Dustin reached the Ohio state quarterfinals in February in the 103-pound weight class. Watching him wrestle is draw-dropping and reminds me of the importance of determination, of loving and respecting my body and its many abilities, and to stop whining about things like cellulite.

Another 18-year-old, Lacey Henderson of Denver, has me slapping myself silly about the stupid crap I often complain about. Check out this pic:

Notice anything "different" about it?

The cheerleader in the middle is wearing a prosthetic leg. When Lacey was nine, a cancerous tumor was discovered in her kneecap and her right leg was amputated six inches above the knee.

Challenge? Yes. Enough to sideline her? No way.

Her mom encouraged her to try cheerleading and Lacey made the team, working her way up to high school cheer captain. Today, you'll find her running, dancing and shouting for the University of Denver.

There are countless other examples of individuals excelling not despite their "dis"abilities but simply because they know they can. One other example is Team Hoyt - the father, Dick, 65, runs marathons and triathalons with miraculous speed, made all the more incredulous because her pushes his son Rick, 46, in a wheelchair. Or pulls him in a small boat while swimming. Or lets him enjoy the wind in his hair as he bikes. (Rick cannot walk or talk as a result of having the blood supply to his brain being cut-off during his birth.)

This picture always gets me. Check it out.

Hey, what are we all doing at the computer? Let's get off our butts and MOVE! Run, dance, swim, take your dog for a walk. Celebrate your body and bookmark this entry for down days in the future. Things might seem dismal or depressing at times, but we all have it in us to rebound and excel.

x,
leslie

Woman-on-top ad...nice!

This morning, I dropped my copy of Men's Health Magazine and it fortuitously spilled open to this new ad from Champion Athletics. Of course, they're just horsing around but it's a refreshing change from ads like this (you know I love bitching about this one whenever possible!)

Spring Break(down)

As I mentioned earlier, I'm on the Today show this morning talking about eating disorders and spring break. Here's the video of the segment.

Watch the segment from TODAY:

I think many of us probably know all too well the pressures of looking like Bo Derek in a skimpy suit while walking on the beach. Now imagine (or remember) that pressure when you're in college, still developing your confidence, forming your self-image, all under the stress of good grades and getting a job and finding new friends and all that fun stuff. I know I've told you about the freshman I spoke to on my college tour who literally cried as she told me about her friends using drugs to shed pounds for Spring break. And recently, I wrote about the pressures for the Huffington Post - here's a sampling...can you relate?

When I was younger, I remember watching MTV Spring Break with the kind of slack jawed attention usually reserved for a child staring glassy-eyed through the bakery shop window at gooey chocolate cupcakes.

Oh, how I longed to be there. Jamaica, Panama City, Lake Havasu - wherever Bill Bellamy and Salt N Pepa were, I wanted in. Mind you, I had never even been kissed...but I knew that this was the definition of sexy, of cool, of hot.

Heaving throngs of lubed-up young adults, all six-packs and pecs and bleach blonde hair, converged around a stage as Marky Mark danced and grinded - coming oh-so-perilously close to losing his Calvins. PM Dawn sang their swoon-worthy "Set Adrift On Memory Bliss" and Pauly Shore stuttered through his seemingly pot-produced jokes. I remember inane, insane competitions in which girls and guys teams had to switch outfits in aboveground, see-through pools and total strangers would hook up on stage in very not-make-your-mother-proud ways.

One image that will forever remain burned in my mind: During a swimsuit fashion show featuring women "discovered" on the beach, a young lady (very naturally pretty in the face, perhaps surgically altered in the chest) emerged from backstage wearing what I suppose could be described as a swimsuit: Picture two white strips of fabric starting at the shoulder, extending over the nipples and converging, thong like, at the bottom. The cheers and howls which greeted her were deafening, drilling into my psyche that hot, popular girls wear skimpy bathing suits, and they do it on Spring break.

Happy first birthday, Weighting Game!

Go Leslie, it's your birthday!
Go WG readers, it's our birthday!

Yup, it's been one year since I first made my foray into blogging and started tip-tap-typing out bon mots and witty euphamisms all for YOU! I am so excited, truly, because this has been such a positive, empowering experience and I have already met - and become friends with - a number of you. One of you took me Spinning in LA! Another one became my phone buddy. Another is meeting me for coffee next week. Fabulous!

Thank you to everyone for your support of Weighting Game, for always checking in, for taking the time to comment...be it a thoughtful couple of paragraphs or just a quick, "LMAO!" (A term which, by the way, I just learned a precious few months ago, despite the fact that there are preschoolers roaming my neighborhood texting far more complicated acronyms. Then again, I thought an MP3 player was an iPod until Friday so what can you do?) I would humbly ask the following favor (it's my birthday - I can beg if I want to): Will you spread me around? You know, tell a friend, a sister, a mangey cat on the street. Tell them how much we all love each other and that if they come here, we'll love them, too! Promise!

This next year, I look forward to a potent mix of stimulating conversation and gossipy blather - a perfect mix, like peanut butter-filled-chocolate-covered-pretzels. Salty and sweet. And overall, simply delicious.

Watch me on the Today Show on Thursday!

Hey everyone,
I'm off to NY for a Today Show appearance (Thursday morning - will post the time slot as soon as it becomes available). UPDATE: 10:02 am EST! Very exciting! The topic? Spring break and eating disorders.
More to come...xoxoxo
Leslie

Breast implants cost 11,500 bimbo dollars and will score you 2,000 bimbo attitudes

Move over Monopoly! Screw you, Chutes and Ladders! Miss Bimbo is coming to town. And she’s going to teach all of your daughters the importance of being slutty and messing up their body image.
(Photo from http://xanthia.wordpress.com)
The online "virtual fashion game for girls" allows girls to name their own bimbo avatar (I just tried but my nickname, Lolly, was already taken.) If I had been able to join, I’d have been given my very own naked bimbo and a mission: dress her in tight clothing and lingerie (these girls are probably wearing "PINK" and "JUICY" splashed across their behinds to begin with), feed her diet pills and nab her a super-rich boyfriend, STAT. I wonder if they have options like"Go to rehab - 8,000 bimbo points" or "accidentally forget to wear underwear - 2 days of guaranteed publicity!"

According to CNN.com, users are told "stop at nothing," even "meds or plastic surgery," to ensure their dolls win.

So it's like The Sims (from what I here) but way, way more hypersexualized and targeted at an even younger audience.

Here's a sampling of the game's "levels,' from the UK Times Online:

Level 7
After you broke up with your boyfriend you went on an eating binge! Now it’s time to diet . . . Your target weight is less than 132lbs

Level 9
Have a nip and tuck operation for a brand new face. You’ve found work as a plus-size model. To gain those vivacious curves, you need to weigh more than 154lbs

Level 10
Summertime is coming up and bikini weather is upon us. You want to turn heads on the beach don’t you?

Level 11
Bigger is better! Have a breast operation

Level 17
There is a billionaire on vacation . . . You must catch his eye and his love! Good luck

The website began in the UK last year and apparently is infiltrating the U.S. Perfect! Another way to screw up our little girls and give them more reasons to think inflated boobs, fake-bake skin and diet pills are the answer to all of life’s ills. As if they don’t have enough being hurled at them already from TV, billboards, magazines, ads, It Girls, their friends, their parents.

I understand that we cant shield our daughters (and sons, for that matter) from all the evils in the world. But really, do we need to purposefully compound the situation by offering up web games full of pink clothing and tanning beds and 100% pure Hoodia? As I understand (still trying to get onto the site...I may try ParisLindsayNicole as my avatar name thi time), Miss Bimbo also offers some positive purchasing options, such as fresh vegetables. But come on...any young girl playing a game like this in the first place is going to get swept up in the craziness and pick diet pills. Even if she does buy some veggies, that's hardly balanced by her frolicking in a virtual world where the ultimate goal is to not work and be supported by a Sugar Daddy. (Speaking of money, it's free to join but eventually the e-money runs out. Don't worry, tho - you can start using a PayPal account or send $3 text messages... one British parent is threatening the (male) creators with a lawsuit after his little girl ran up a $200 cell phone bill sending Miss Bimbo texts, according to the Times of London newspaper).

Sigh...what happened to having a little doggie as a pet?

PS I was just interviewed by ABC News for this - will send a link when it's up.
Here it is!

Like, OMG did you know that eating less/exercising more is SO last decade?!

I constantly get spam like this sent to me because of my prolific (and finely-tuned, amusing, educational, etc) writing and I have to share this one because, well, it's breaking medical news that you need to know. My own interpretation is added in bold.

"Have you ever been told that the only way to lose weight is the Old Fashioned method of eating less and exercising more? Only by crap spammers like you.

If this were true, how come we’re getting fatter even though we’re starting (sic) ourselves and working out like crazy in the gym? You women especially know what I mean (forgotten period theirs, not mine.) Oh, do we ever! Women are basically 100% responsible for the obesity problem in this country, anyhow, and it's because we simply cannot control ourselves, pigging out 24/7.

Would you believe us if we told you that by EATING MORE and never again eating a “DIET” food could cause you to lose weight? (and reverse a whole host of other health related issues at the same time) (again) Not if it involves taking some shady supplement or being injected with cattle urine.

DON’T MISS our Conference Call to find out if this makes sense to you…

WHO: Jill Price, Certified Weight Loss Coach, METABOCleanse™ Well, there it is.

WHAT: Conference Call via your own phone in the privacy of your own home/office. Could be a nice way to pass 15 minutes while slaving away in a corporate America cublicle. Dial into a pre-reserved number along with a pin code and be connected to a live Q & A (number to be given upon registration – FREE)

WHY: Find out how eating more and steering clear of diet soda, fat-free dressings and low fat foods can actually heal your bodies’ natural ability to slim itself Why so afraid of punctuation and grammar? Do they make you fat, too?

WHEN: Next Tuesday, April 1st, 8:30 p.m. EST Really? April Fool's Day. Rilly.

HOW: Register for FREE

Email Jill at jill@thisishorsecrap.com or call her at (999) NOT-TRUE. Conference Call Telephone Number and Pin Code will be issued at the time of Registration I made up this email address to relect my disdain for the concept. Do not blame me if you go to thisishorsecrap.com and find something very disturbing and life-altering.

This call is for information purposes only. You will not be charged a fee, nor will you be pressured into signing up for anything. coughbullshitcough This call is structured with our best intentions – to give you the opportunity to see if our Weight Loss/Detox theories make sense to you and fit into your belief system, your lifestyle and your budget!" Actually, the website says $75 per teleclass and $400 for "cleansing herbs and supplements."

Y'all, this reminds me of one of my very favorite commercials on TV now - for a product called Akavar that promises all sorts of weight loss and money and glitter and fame, with a man repeatedly proclaiming, in a low, deep voice "And we couldn't say it on TV if it wsn't true." Um, really? You can't say things on TV unless they're true? Because I watched Bret Michael's Rock of Love Part 2 on the tele last night and I'm prett-y sure some of that stuff is made up. Although I do heart the hopelessly long and incredibly clumsy Akavar website: http://www.eatallyouwantandstillloseweight.com/

How's this for a link: www.stoptakingpills andstickingpelletsupyerbumjustbecausesometwitonTV tellsyouitwillmakeyouthinitwon't.org.au

50 and topless!

No, that's not the tentative title for my in-my-dreams forthcoming memoir.

Remember when Jamie Lee Curtis posed in a sportsbra and bicycle shorts, sans makeup or airbrushing, for More Magazine? OMG, that was so amazing. Courageous, I say, because she stepped out from the uber-perfect frame used to highlight celebrities - and extremely empowering, to boot.

Once again, JLC is taking it off to show age has nothing to do with gorgeousity. She's on the cover of this month's AARP The Magazine to celebrate her 50th birthday. (Who knew 50 was "retirement age"?) And girl is topless.

Click read more to see the cover.

Now, you can't actually see anything, nudity-wise. But with her natural salt-and-pepper hair and toned shoulders, she's driving home a point. In the magazine, she says, "I want to be older. I actually think there's an incredible amount of self-knowledge that comes with getting older. I feel way better now than I did when I was 20. I'm stronger, I'm smarter in every way, I'm so much less crazy than I was then."

*love*

I was reading about how, a few years ago, some tabloid published a pic of her and listed her weight as 161 pounds. J. Lee Curtis was like, "How dare you! I'm not 161 pounds!" And she went home, hopped on a scale...and it read 161 pounds. Not that that's an abnormal weight for a tall woman or anything but she decided to shape up a bit and started eating healthier foods and working out (she does yoga and plays tennis three times a week) - over the next year, she dropped about 20 pounds in a healthy way."

Could a celebrity Calendar Girls be far behind? Picture it, in 20 years: Jamie Lee, Goldie Hawn, Angela Bassett, Glenn Close, Ellen Barkin...who else?

I am so smart

I was doing this thing the other day called "surfing the web" - maybe you've heard of it? - and I found my way to a fitness website where the writer was posting about this free relaxation music people could downlowd to their MP3s. Very cool, I thought, but I don't have an MP3. I was in a write-y mood so I left a message that said something like, "Wow - I would love something like this but I'm tech-illiterate and only have an iPod, not an MP3. Boo."

This, clearly, was before I knew an iPod is an MP3!! How did I find this out? Oh, because the guy who writes the blog actually contacted me (I left my web site) and said, in a joking manner, "Whoa - you really are tech-illiterate! An MP3 player is the same thing as an iPod."

Hey - I didn't go to grad school for nothing! Don't hate the player...hate the game.

Peace out,
Lolly

We women and our wiley ways

Many of you may be sitting at home, perhaps snuggled up with your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/lover/paid escort, thinking "I am so happy and thankful to have this person. He/she is so kind/loving/compassionate/good in bed/willing to tie me up and pour maple syrup on me." Well, my friends, if you are not extraordinarily pretty, you may, in fact, be wrong.

What the hell am I talking about, you ask?

I found this study - the press release is entitled, "Do attractive women want it all?" which I love because, um, hell yes and not just the "attractive" ones. And we all deserve it. OK, tangent. Anyhoo, the University of Texas at Austin study casts a shadow over the popular belief that women choose our partners based on the kind of relationship we want (ie if we want something long-term, we look for someone who'll bring home the bacon and take our kids to Wii practice; but if we just want a quick bonk, a hairy chest and chiseled jaw win out. If you're into that kind of thing.) Hogwash, these researchers say. The new theory: We'll take what we can get, and gals who are widely considered hot maintain high standards for prospective lovahs. So we'd better be super pretty and smart and highly-paid and successful because if we're shlubby or chubby or blue-collar, that's the kind of guy we can expect to see when we roll over in bed.

The researchers ID'd four categories of characteristics women seek in a partner:

Good genes, reflected in desirable physical traits
Resources (they make it sound so romantic!)
The desire to have children and good parenting skills
Loyalty and devotion (awww...)

Interestingly enough, while women’s choosiness across these categories reflected how attractive they appeared to other people, researchers found the characteristics men desired in a partner did not vary based on their own physical attractiveness. In plainer words: Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley. Lyle Lovett and Julia Roberts. Etc.

Those worked out well.

Of course, I'm taking these researcher's conclusions a wee bit out of context - they're examining this phenomenon from an anthropologic and evolutionary standpoint and published their data in an academic journal. I, um, am blogging about it.

But I do tink (hah! I wrote "tink" instead of "think" but it looks too cute to correct) it's an interesting concept worth discussing because it once again shows the emphasis of looks in our culture and proves, in its own way, that no matter how good-hearted and accepting we believe we are, on some innate level, there's always this primal "Me want pretty children" yearning churning inside of us.

I'd like to hear from you - if you're in a relationship, how do you and your mate stack up in these four categories? Do you think when you first met, you consciously assessed the other's potential to be a good provider? (BTW it's OK to say yes - lots of people like shiny sportscars and a sharp suit.) Can you ever imagine yourself adjusting your requirements in, say, the Loyalty category because you suspect you're not the cutest puppy in the litter and thus must lower your standards? (pleasesaynopleasesayno.) I can honestly and wholeheartedly say I've never dated anyone based on potential earning power OR the desire to have children, while loyalty and devotion are paramount. I would NEVER sacrifice in that category. As for Dan's chiseled, extra-wide shoulders and deep blue eyes and luscious, kissable lips? Gravy, baby.

Can dieting every other day work?

Imagine being able to eat to your heart's content on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Really, carve into that steak and sip a glass of red wine or two; maybe even wrap it up with some Ben & Jerry's for dessert. The catch? You can only nibble on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. We're talking non-fat yogurt for breakfast, fruit for lunch and a salad for dinner. You eat like a Queen half the time; a rabbit the other half.

Sound doable? If so, you may be a prime candidate for a growing every-other-day nutrition movement sometimes known as "up day-down day" dieting, explored in the book The Alternate-Day Diet (G.P. Putnam's Sons; April, 2008).

The author, a plastic surgeon named James B. Johnson from Metairie, La., conceptualized the book by borrowing from animal studies showing that mice and primates fed only every other day experience profound health benefits. Numerous studies have shown that daily calorie restriction -- not fad diets but carefully planned, nutrient-dense meals with 30 percent fewer calories than average -- may alter the development or progression of age-related diseases such as cancer, diabetes, Alzheimer's, heart disease and more. And research conducted on mice, published in the Oct. 2007 issue of the Journal of Lipid Research, indicates that fasting or even eating half as much as normal on alternate days may shrink one's fat cells, possibly protecting against obesity and Type 2 diabetes.

A self-described "mindless eater," Johnson himself was overweight five years ago, standing 6'4" and weighing 255 to 265 pounds. Rather than abstain from eating on alternate days -- a Herculean task for most people -- he modified the concept by taking in just 20 percent of his estimated daily caloric intake. Three months later, he had shed 35 pounds.

Behaviorally speaking, Johnson explained that alternate-day dieting helps prevent the boredom that often accompanies eating skinless chicken with steamed broccoli for dinner every night. Or never allowing a carb to pass your lips, for that matter. "With this pattern," he told me, "the person can look forward to the 'up' day. Anybody can diet for one day, and that's all you need to know from a practical standpoint."

Consider Johnson's sample two-day diet plan: A typical "up" day means consuming pretty much whatever he wants, about 2,700 calories. But the "down" day? Half of a protein shake for breakfast and lunch each and a salad with broth-based soup for dinner. Rrrrumble (editor's note - that's my stomach growling). A snack of a piece of fruit brings him to about 500 to 600 calories. (During maintenance phase, he eats more on "down" days -- 30 to 50 percent of his estimated caloric requirement.)

Besides helping trim your figure while allowing you to indulge in your favorite treats, Johnson said, alternate-day dieting could lead to long-term health improvements by activating a genetic mechanism called SIRT1. This so-called "longevity gene" has been shown by Harvard Medical School researchers to promote the long-term survival of irreplaceable cells, thus contributing to extended life. In a recent (though very small) study led by Johnson, asthmatics experienced a significant reduction in their symptoms within two weeks of being on the diet. It's not weight loss that helped their condition, he explained, but rather the anti-inflammatory effect of the very low-calorie diet (asthma is an inflammatory disease). Study subjects demonstrated what Johnson calls "a striking reduction in oxidative stress markers" -- indicators of free-radical damage, which leads to cancer, heart disease, arthritis and more.

Richard Weindruch, a professor of medicine at the University of Wisconsin at Madison (Go Badgers!), has studied calorie restriction in mice and primates for more than 33 years. Of the different ways to impose caloric restriction, he said, overall calorie restriction yields the most robust results (see the insane but real photo below).


The rhesus monkey on the left is 25 years old and eats a calorie restricted diet. The guy on the right? HE's only one year older but eats a normal diet. Yikes!

Research has shown that eating 30 to 40 percent fewer calories every day translates to an increase in longevity of the same percentage. "This produces retardation of aging and diseases of aging -- even graying of the hair," he said. "It's a state of under-nutrition but not malnutrition." Smaller studies suggest that shaving overall calories by even 10 percent to 15 percent can clear the way for a proportional increase in longevity, he said. "So if [Johnson's] diet is able to restrict calories by a little bit, it can be a good thing. Whether the diet can actually do that is unknown."

What do y'all think? Could you live on a drastically reduced diet every other day, knowing you could indulge tomorrow, and the day after the next, etc? In a sense, it does teach moderation, so long as you're not bingeing one day and starving on the other day. But I feel like I might be prone to ordering deep dish pizza and eating ice cream straight from the tub with a soup ladle on my "up" days, thinking, "Oh, it'll all balance out tomorrow." then again, when I think of my current eating plan, it's not ALL that different from this. If I overeat one day, I tend to cut back the next. What are your thoughts?

Will someone please cut off my toe?

Seriously.

I am in major pain, my friends. Who knew a little digit could put someone out of commission for days?

It all started about a week and a half ago. After working out, I started stripping (in the locker room, yes!) and as I kicked off my shoes, I discovered my left sock soaked through with blood. Nice. But, being the perpetual klutz I am, I chalked it up to somehow kicking/tripping/smashing it without realizing it and went about my business.

Smart. I'll make a great parent, huh?

So, the next day, it was throbbing. I took an Advil.

The next day is was red and throbbing hard (hey - I think I just named Ron Jeremy's next porno!) I soaked it in scalding water and Betadine leftover from the 19th century. Only mild relief. I was actually woken up in the middle of the night from the pain and stood in my bathroom, eyes groggy, hair mussed, perched like a pelican with my foot in the sink at 4am.

Finally, I thought, "WTF - I live over a freaking podiatrist's office! I'll just go get it checked out."

Diagnosis: Gangrene.

Kidding! Actually, I had two - not one but two - ingrown toenails on My Left Foot. Second and third digit, left foot, double ouch. I then proceeded to undergo minor surgery on the spot, with the doc shooting three huge vials full of long-lasting anesthetic between my freaking toes. I squeezed the nurse's hand so tightly he actually asked to leave the room. The doc then went to town, digging out the offending pieces of toenail (approx. the size of a flea - like gallstones and splinters, it's the little buggers that cause the most pain). He wrapped my foot up like a mummy and off I went to Starbucks to write, dragging my gimp foot behind me like a hunchback.

The anesthesia really worked, and I felt no pain - no nothing - for a good two days. And then, early a.m. Sunday, I was awoken with an awful, pulsating pain radiating through my foot. I triple downed on Advil per my doc's advice and tried to fall back asleep. The OTC stuff worked for a few hours at which point I thought, "Why am I sitting here suffering? Clearly I need something stronger." I mean, did James Cann take baby aspirin after Kathy Bates hobbled him in Misery? I think not. So I called him and the doc got me some Tylenol 3 with Codeine.

Tired of my rambling yet? Oh well.

So Dan got my my drugs and the first night, I waited with giddy anticipation for the stuff to kick in and bring me to a dreamy La La Land where unicorns transported us to and from work and Cadbury Eggs grew on trees. Alas, I slept fitfully.

That was Sunday. Yesterday, I made it through the day AOK, no pain, even worked out (gently.) Hit Costco for $150 worth of toilet paper and hummus and, upon walking in the front door at 8:30pm, my foot began screaming in pain. Out of NOWHERE! I downed a super Tylenol. Nothing. Took two Advil. Still, I was on the verge of tears - and not because Girlicious was on. So I took another Tylenol with Codeine.

About an hour later, at 10pm, it all kicked in, mercifully. I fell asleep/passed out soon thereafter and had the most disturbing dreams for what seemed like 18 hours but was actually only 60 minutes. I woke up and started freaking out that I wasn't breathing well (a side effect, I learned this a.m. on the internet, of the drug). Oh, wonderful. I asked Dan, who was up working way late, (something huge happened with interest rates yesterday - I try to ignore important mainstream news) to keep checking on me because I though I was going to die like Heath Ledger. He came in an hour later and confirmed I was breathing VERY slowly but I was super sweaty - and naked...I have no idea when or how that happened. Even though I'm normally calm (ha!) I entered near panic-attack mode and started freaking out. Then I slept for a few more hours and dreamt about horrible torture scenes, kissing Paris Hilton (same thing, I suppose) and also I was a horse that could pee in any color on command.

Now, I'm at a Cosi, drinking an Americano - more legal drugs! - and my toe is fine but good Lord am I screwed up or WHAT? No more Tylenol 3 for me.

Lesson to be learned: If you pull off your shoe and your sock is socked with blood, don't just stare at it, slackjawed, like Jeff Spicoli on acid. Do something!

Dirty martini, anyone? (it's green-ish!)

Today, the Chicago River is bleeding. 'Tis a sad site, really - fluorescent green liquid coursing through my city. I know the dye is non-toxic but still...it's just so wrong.

Also wrong today: Green beer. It's everywhere, advertised on Irish pubs; in email chains sent by distant relatives (um, we're Jewish, remember? We drink purple Manischewitz); featured in newspaper and online articles. Can I just say, I would sooner tuck into a stick of butter than chug some kelly green ale.

Truth: I have not had a beer - any kind of beer - since 1995. This not an exaggeration. Miller, Blue Moon, Guinness, Woodchuck - I hate it. Loathe it. To me, the taste of beer is similar to, if not worse than, the smell of fabric Band-aids mixed with peanuts. BarfGagGross. I only drank it to catch a buzz during my freshman year of college. Once my oh-so-fabulous fake ID came in the mail, I jettisoned the keg for Long Island Iced Teas. Which, I might add, I also no longer imbibe. I would probably get drunk off two sips of that crap we used to love so much.

If you like the stuff, by all means, I toast you. Enjoy it, get a lil shnockered, stick out your green tongue. To drink or not to drink green beer is a deeply personal choice. Just don't take down too much...that's one nasty hangover I don't want to see.

PS For some freaking funny (and potentially offensive...you've been warned) St. Patrick's Day e-cards, visit someecards.com

Singing to a skinny tune

We all have music that inspires us to workout harder or faster. "Stronger" by Cristina Aguilera. "Sexy Back" by Justin Timberlake. "Pump Up The Jam" by Technotronic.

But "Incredible Shrinking Women" by Heidi Roizen?

Um, no.

I'm all for motivating people - carrot beats stick any day - but the thought of women running laps while blasting the following lyrics through their iPods churns my stomach:

( I just wanna be)
Thin! -- I don’t deny it. Thin! -- I wanna try it
Thin! -- but I can’t buy it. Guess I’ll have to di- di- diet

It sounds like some sort of indoctrinating tool or cultish chant. I was actually pitched this CD a couple of months ago as a possible story idea for Weighting Game but I decided against it because I try to promote a message of body love and acceptance, balanced with fitness and good, healthy food. This CD is, I feel, the antithesis of this. It's like wall-papering a gym in magazine ads featuring models in bikinis and stilettos. In the abc.com article, Roizen says "We're not trying to get people to be skinny or reach any particular weight." But with lyrics about not eating pie or songs titled "Thin!" and "Skinny Jeans," how can this not be the case?

Apparently, lots of people really DO believe that whole "sitting next to a fat person" thing.

As you may have noticed, a recent entry of mine seems to have generated a good deal of interest. The story is about NYC writer Kim Brittingham, who created a faux book about fat being contagious in response to the reactions she got while sitting on the bus. The fabulous and very well-travelled Huffington Post crosslinked to Weighting Game, thus broadening the audience.

This is, of course, fantastic in terms of fostering a dialogue. Unfortunately, though the audience broadened, it didn't necessarily become more productive.

I sat back in shock as I saw the amount of unbridled hatred so many individuals have for overweight people. It. Is. Stunning. Understood, people who are bigger take up more physical space. I'm not gonna argue with physics. But just because someone is heavy or short or tall or thin or homeless (I mean, really?! Did that person actually compare being heavy with being homesless and scabby?), that does not dictate his or her worth as a human being. And no one who is simply trying to go about her daily life - so long as she's not randomly shooting puppies - deserves to be made to feel like shit. Fine, yes, by all means remain standing if someone is taking up too much of the the seat. I don't particularly like rubbing against strangers either - particularly men with beady eyes, facial hair and an open fly. But don't stand as a moral statement declaring your hatred of all things plus-sized. Don't stand because you think the person's disgusting. Because she's not. She's a human being with parents and friends and kids and A HEART. She or he doesn't need you to shoot disgusted glares or tsk-tsk at them or call your friend to talk about how this GREAT, BIG FAT WOMAN is on the train. Chances are, the overweight individual knows her girth. Believe it or not, some people who weigh over 200 pounds are actually smart.

Nature...nurture...this is a huge, overwhelming debate to get into. Many commenters pointed out that obesity is a lifestyle choice. Like playing softball or blogging. These people refuse to see genetics as a possible component. Well, sorry to break the news but guess what? It's both - genetic and lifestyle - and we have gotten cuaght in a losing argument about a growing problem. Yes, I do think our country is struggling with an obesity epidemic - the World Health Organization classifies about 400 million people worldwide as obese, including 200 million children under age five - I just don't think demoralizing people is the answer. Call me cuckoo.

According to a major British study of more than 5,000 pairs of young twins published last month in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, genes account for more than three-quarters of the differences in a child's waistline and weight. What researchers did: Compare outcomes between identical twins, who share all of their genes, and fraternal twins, who share half. What they found: 77 percent of the difference between thinner and heavier twins could be attributed to genetic differences. That doesn't mean you are doomed to obesity if you come from an overweight family. What it does mean is the odds are stacked against you, that you have a stronger genetic predisposition to gaining weight and it may not be as easy to brush off factors like the home you live in, the food you are served as a child, the culture you live in, your work and social environment and more.

I am not excusing people from overeating day after day, or fellating people who choose to run marathon versus play Nintendo (not that I am in any position to excuse anyone or grant anyone permission to do whatever. Lord knows I've made some food/exercise-related mistakes in my life.) And I am not saying people are powerless over genetics. We make choices all day long, every day, in all areas of life. The son of an alcoholic father knows he needs to be extra careful with his drinking, as the genetic odds are stacked against him. That doesn't mean he can't enjoy a martini or have a glass of wine with dinner, but he needs to know one glass will turn to three more easily for him than another person.

Personally, I wholeheartedly support a healthy lifestyle full of exercise, good-for-you food, laughter, therapy and all that good stuff...with some vices *coughCadburyEggscough* thrown in for good measure. I don't think people should take the elevator one floor up when the stairs are right there...unless, of course, they are ill or wheelchair-bound or what have you. If the reason they are taking the elevator is because they are obese and have limited lung capacity, then that should be a sign it's time to get their eating and physical activity under control. Or to address a medical condition that may be contributing to their weight. Or talk to a therapist about why they're possible using food as an emotional salve.

But it is not a sign they deserve to be called dirty, unkept, lazy, uncaring or sad. They do not, as one poster commented, need or want pity. I think Josie did an excellent job of summing it up as follows:

Joel, you're "generally" not disgusted by fat people? Well, that's decent of you, I suppose. But you are disgusted by what we eat and how much. Have you thought to ask your yourself and/or your psychologist all the reasons why you believe this way? Are you equally disgusted by all forms of excess (e.g., raping of the environment, excessive wealth, uncontrolled spending)? My intention is not to personally attack you or belittle the changes you've made that have had a positive effect on your life, but rather to get you and others to think about why this preoccupation with weight dominates our culture and why it is ok to so harshly judge our fellow humans. When you say you "feel bad for them," to me, you come across as self-righteous instead of empathetic. I hope I'm wrong about this. In addition to being "lied to and confused by the American food culture," I propose that we all seriously and honestly consider what role meanness, vanity, hypocrisy, and control play in "keeping ourselves fat"...You can never really know what another person's life is like. The older I get, the more keenly aware I am of this, and the more useless and unimportant it becomes to argue with people hell-bent on trying to make me realize just how unworthy I am.

OK, but only because Charlotte asked...

Here is the link to the McDonalds trayline featuring me and the new TV show. Thousands of Chicagoans are currently eating cheeseburgers off my abs without even realizing it!

Emma Thompson, will you adopt me?

US Weekly arrived yesterday - always a thrill in my household. Dan snapped it up before I could get my greasy little paws on it and proceeded to read aloud a story to me which basically went like this:

Emma Thompson reportedly threatened to quit her upcoming movie, Brideshead Revisited, after learning that Miramax producers had ordered her co-star, Hayley Atwell, 25, to lose weight.

This is Hayley (in the red):

As you can see, she IS quite large. (Note: I am JOKING!)

Emma learned about the weight loss mandate when he costar was visiting her home but eschewing most of the food Emma served. Says Hayley, "I told her why and she hit the roof."

Ultimately, Miramax backed off and Emma did not resign. But she did manage to make this blogger green with envy for her firm stance and huge, huge balls. Go, girl! We all need a friend like you!

"How Sitting Next To A Fat Person Can Make You Fat"

A NYC writer by the name of Kim Brittingham found herself fed up with the stares and glares and outright rude comments she often receives while riding the bus. (Kim weighs around 250 pounds and is accepting of her size, as well as the word "fat." ) However, there's only so much a person can take and she soon grew tired of experiences like this:

"I've been on buses that filled to an inhumane capacity, with commuters packed in like desperate refugees or sows to the slaughter. Still, the seat beside me remained empty. I once watched a woman tolerate being wedged between a foul-smelling man with roaming hands and a perspiring giant with a hairy armpit an inch from her face, yet she staunchly refused to collapse comfortably into the seat available at my side. To be fair, she might've been enjoying the feel-up, but judging by her expression of disgust and the dirty looks she kept shooting at me, I think not. Why wouldn't she just sit? And what had I done to deserve the evil eye? Had I contaminated an otherwise perfectly good seat by situating my deadly girth beside it?" (Posted on freshyarn.com)

Kim did not sit idly by. She got creative. She designed a fake book cover on her home computer, complete with bar code, a picture of a large cartoon woman on a scale, a faux author (Kimberly Cox, PhD, the name of one of her childhood tormentors). The jacket got wrapped around a biography and Kim proceeded to "read" from it every day in public for the next four months.

Reactions ranged from double-takes to whispers to drop-jawed confusion and fear. One young woman actually called her friend on her cell and said, in a not-so-quiet voice, "Cheryl, it's me. Listen. I'm on the 79 bus and I'm sitting across from this woman who's reading a book called, Fat is Contagious: How Sitting Next to a Fat Person Can Make You Fat. No, I'm serious. Yes. I know it's mind-boggling. Should I ask? O.K., well, can you check Amazon for me?"

Many of you may recall a recent study out of the New England Journal of Medicine which showed that obesity is, in fact, "contagious," in that it is spread socially - not by coughing or kissing. Harvard researchers found that a person's chances of becoming obese increase by 57% if they have a friend who becomes obese; 40% if they have a sibling who becomes obese; and 37% if a spouse becomes obese. These numbers no doubt reflect shared interests and attitudes, dining and relaxation time spent together, and more.

But the situation facing Kim - and millions of other men and women out there - is blatant discrimination. Attacking people for being heavy is one of the last remaining socially acceptable prejudices. On Fox’s lie detector show “The Moment of Truth,” one question posed was: "Do fat people repulse you?" As I mentioned two posts ago, people often feel like they can anything they want in reference to a stranger's weight, no matter what their size.

If you were on the bus and you saw an overweight woman reading a book titled Fat is Contagious: How Sitting Next to a Fat Person Can Make You Fat, how do you think you would react? Would your get the joke? Be horrified? Embarrassed? And how does that answer differ from how you might react if you saw an overweight woman reading a book called, oh, I don't know, Skinny Bitch?

Too much noise

Why don't people stop and think before they speak? I swear, it's like our society's collective filter has eroded away like the ozone layer and the result is a bunch of us feeling like crap.

Examples, you ask? Well, I'd be happy to. The following three conversations took place within a recent 24-hour-period at my gym.

A) As I blowdry my hair, I overhear a mother say to her approximately-six-year-old daughter, "Let's get you on the scale - Daddy wants to know how much you weigh." Does he, now? Interesting. I want to know how much Daddy weighs.

Taken out of context, I have no clue why this girl's father wanted to know her weight. It could very well have been for something practical, like an insurance chart, or out of totally benign curiosity. Still, to a young girl cultivating and developing her self-image, such a request can and does have an impact. Maybe not a direct, significant impact, but over time, if a parent keeps asking how much a child weighs - even with the purest of intentions - something is going to go haywire.

B) While in a packed-to-the-serene-green-walls yoga class, our instructor was helping stagger the mats so nobody would inadvertently clock their neighbor during Sun Salutation. As more people poured in, our instructor - who I've always known as being very not focused on appearances - makes the following announcement. In front of everybody: "We should see if the squash courts are open next door. Maybe we can send over someone tall and slender and blonde...like Leslie...to persude the guys to empty out." Whoosh - every head turns to me.

Now, I'm an attention fiend in general and understand she meant this as a compliment of some sorts. But the result, ironically, is that it made me feel like crap. Yoga is all about uniting your body and mind and achieving tranquility, and to have my physique called out in such a pointed way rendered me unable to focus on anything else but that for the rest of class. I thought, "Are all these other people looking at me and appraising my physical appearance? Do they think I'm full of myself? Do my unkempt feet and not-quite-shaved armpits gross them out?" I realize now that she may have chosen my name because I tend to be outspoken and friendly - Cindy Crawford's twin sister could have been three mats down from me but if she's quiet and stays to herself, the teacher's not going to make a fuss over her. Still, interesting how a compliment wound up lowering my self-esteem.

3) This isn't exactly what someone said, so much as a strong non-verbal communication. In the locker room, I saw - quite literally - one of (if not the) most anorexic women I have ever seen up close and personal. She is about 50, though she looks much older because of the sadness and anger and lack of fat to fill out wrinkles on her face. As she raised her arms to take off her top, I could see the entire outline of her pelvis poking through her leggings, which bagged around the thighs and knees. It was so, so sad.

Then I saw, a few rows over, was a mother and her pre-teen daughter. They were chatting and had clearly not seen the woman. For a moment, a thought came over me: "Tell them! Tell the mother to stay out, to shield her child from this depressing reality." But I didn't. Life happens and I can't be around (nor should I be) to protect random strangers from disheartening sites. I'm not a superwoman - I just play one on my blog.

Part of me did feel comtempt for the anorexic woman, standing there, completely naked, a ghost of a body. "Doesn't she know what she's doing?" I thought. "Doesn't she care that it's a Saturday and there are tons of kids running around and she has a responsibility to not scare them?" But you know what? She doesn't. She doesn't know because she is suffering from a mental illness and doesn't see what the world sees when she looks at her body.

Sigh. Sorry to be a Debbie Downer today. I'll be more uplifting after 3pm when a TV crew comes to interview me. Stay tuned for more info!

x,
Leslie

Cheezburger, cheezburger

Oy vey.

A kosher restaraunt on New York's Upper West Side called Talia’s Steak House is making people all meshugana by offering a kosher cheeseburger. (To learn what "kosher" means, click here. One of the main tenets is you cannot combine milk and meat products in one meal, which is the very essence of a cheeseburger.) This burger skirts the K issue by using tofu cheese instead of good old Kraft Singles. So it offers some diners the chance to indulge in a cheesy, beefy treat while technically still being "good."

First of all, allow me to express my absolute shock that the Jewish community - of which I am a proud member, despite everyone thinking this 5'10" blonde is a shiksa - has found yet another way to turn food into something to obsess over.

That said, let's address the controversy. The New York Post quoted Rabbi Basil Herring, Executive Vice President of the Rabbinical Council of America, as saying “Jewish law is very concerned for appearances. Not only should you always do the right thing, but it should be seen as the right thing.” And kosher-keeping comedian Jackie Mason, who I most certainly never ever thoughtI'd be quoting on Weighting Fame, said the faux burger "makes me nauseous just thinking about it."

But others are saying if it's technically still kosher, let them eat meat.

Question: Isn't this similar to vegetarians noshing on Not Dog and Boca Burgers? Technically, you're still abiding by the dietary laws of the land. I suppose diehard veggies would be so grossed out be the concept of meat that soy nuggets are just as gross - so can the same be said of strictly Kosher Jews?

As for myself, I grew up in a culturally Jewish yet extremely non-kosher household. My dad is a freaking seafood broker, for crying out loud! Many nights, we dined on meatloaf with cheese melted inside or ordered in pepperoni pizza as a treat.

So weigh in - whether you're Jewish, Christian, vegetarian or carnivore (or any of the other bazillion religions and dietary codes out there). Is this an offensive burger? Or a fun chance to indulge, worthy of shlepping all the way to NYC? And does this mean that Dan and I can finally serve shrimp cocktail at our five-year wedding anniversary?

Oy, I'm all ver klempt.

To all the fabulous ladies out there

Today is International Women's Day!

So stand up and be recognized. Take a bow for all you do. And send a card (like the one above, from the National Organization for Women) to an inspiring gal you know and respect.

xoxox

Read up

I've been meaning to give you all a fun ittle round-up of some solid, smart books out there right now, but have put it off as things like sleeping and eating got in the way. But now, I'm ready to give a few recs. The question is, are you? Can you handle this? Let's see.

1) BODY DRAMA: Real Girls, Real Bodies, Real Answers (Gotham, 2008) is the kind of book I think so many of us wish we'd had when going through our angsty, pimply, smelly teenage years. It's kind of a Straight Dope, updated version of Deal with It! A Whole New Approach to Your Body, Brain, and Life as a gURL (a longtime fave of mine.)

The author, Nancy Amanda Redd, is a Harvard alum and recent Miss Virginia, named by Glamour Magazine as one of America’s top-ten college women “most likely to succeed—at anything." Not. Too Shabby.

The book tackles many issues close to my heart: body image, breasts, photos of real women and much more. This would be a perfs gift for a daughter in junior high - it answers all the questions so many young girls are afraid to ask, like "Why is one boob bigger than the other? or "What can I do about zits on my back?" or "What’s up with that smell?" Here's a excerpt that does a good job of setting the tone and style of the tome:

“You’d think a Miss America swimsuit winner would feel completely confident about her body, right? Not always! So I decided to write the book I wish I’d had as a teen and in college—an honest, funny, practical, medically accurate, totally reassuring guide to how women’s bodies actually look, smell, feel, behave, and change. Alongside real-deal photographs of women just like you and me (no airbrushing, no supermodels, no kidding) you’ll find medical pictures of things you need to be able to recognize, true confessions by yours truly, and the encouragement you need to appreciate the uniqueness, strength, and beauty of your body. What are you waiting for?”" –Nancy Redd

PS Kudos to the book for becoming a New York Times Best-Seller and to Redd for being nominated for a 2008 NAACP Image Award nominee!

2) 101 Foods That Could Save Your Life (Bantam, 2007) is not exactly the kind of light reading you crave while riding the train to work, but this book by David Grotto is a phat compendium of knowledge, painstakingly put together (I know - he's a colleague of mine :-) in an accessible way. Grotto examines practically every food under the sun - well, 101 of the best, actually - and gives you the low-down on each one. Not only textbook stuff like key nutrients and antioxidants, but each entry includes a history of the food’s origin, therapeutic benefits along with scientific research, tips for use and preparation, and a yummy recipe from a leading chef or nutritionist. I just picked up my copy, randomly opened it and I arrived at p249, Pineapple (Ananas comosus). Fun fact: Canned pineapple was not widely available until 1911 when an engineer invented a machine that could removed the outer shell, inner core and both ends of 100 tangy suckers in less than 60 seconds. Even funner fact: Pineapple peel may be effective in removing corns...from your feet. Now I know what to do with leftovers from the Grilled Pineapple and Chili Porrk Tenderloin I'm whipping up tonight!

3) For anyone out there who suffers from celiac disease, intestinal issues or is on a gluten-free diet, have I got the book for you! Everyday Grain-Free Gourmet: Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner (Whitecap Books 2008) has just launched. It's written by two women (co-author Jodi Bager was diagnosed with life-threatening ulcerative colitis in 2000 after the birth of her second; co-author Jenny Lass was diagnosed with celiac disease in 2001), both of whom have adopted something called the Specific Carbohydrate Diet to deal with their own ailments and want to spread the word on eating healthy, delish foods...something that needn't stop because you have celiac disease, ulcerative colitis, Crohn's or any other tummy trouble.

Have a fabulous weekend everyone! Good luck on your Pilates certification, Alyssa - you'll do wonderfully! And don't forget, Spring Ahead at 2am Sunday. Losing an hour: Blech. Having something really exciting to look forward to in October: Yay! It's all about how you see the glass, peeps.

Shout-out to one of my all-time fave books, Bridge to Terabithia...and I'm not just saying that because the awesome girl character was named Leslie.

McBlogging with Crabby McSlacker

There comes a time in every writer's life where she realizes, huh, maybe - c'est possible? - I'm not the absolute funniest, bestest wordsmith in the world.

Now, of course, this moment hasn't happened for me, but I've come pretty damn close. My challenger? Crabby McSlacker, self-annointed "Blog Founder and Senior Whiner" of Cranky Fitness. I'm not sure exactly what led me to her site but I remember thinking, "Holy shit, this chick is hysterical. And snarky. And smart." I wanted to be her.

Instead, I stalked her, begging/demanding a cross-interview. After greasing the emails with a few $20s, she relented and here we are. Below you will find her answers to my questions, and over on her blog, you will find my As to her Qs. I encourage you all to bookmark her site - girl is sassy, whipsmart and entertaining. Just don't leave me. Please. Beneath all this tough, patent-leather-and-lace, 5'11" exterior lays a blogger who needs your love and affection like Ferocia Coutura needs her hairspray.

Love to all and welcome to any new Crabby readers!!!

Why so crabby, Cranky?
Well, I like to think I'm a lot more cranky when I'm writing for the blog than I am in person. In real life I'm pretty shy and mild mannered. But then anyone who's ever tried to watch television with me knows I can't just relax and shut up. I argue back at the tv constantly because I'm so opinionated and skeptical. So I guess the "cranky" part of Crabby McSlacker isn't entirely made up.

I just find a lot to whine and complain about in the health and fitness world. There's so much contradictory and outright silly information out there! The problem is, there's so much you have to do to stay healthy, and it's not always fun, and what makes it worse is that our culture doesn't really support healthy choices.

Your web site says your blog exists "Because most health and fitness advice is too damn cheerful." Do you think readers are sick of reading happy posts full of exclamation marks and "You can do it!"s? In other words, why do you think your tell-it-like-it-is attitude works as well as it does?
Well, I don't know if it works or not, but Merry (her blogging partner) and I do have a lot of fun writing Cranky Fitness and we hope at least some people can relate. 'Cause let's face it: healthy living is often a pain in the ass. Broccoli doesn't taste as good as ice cream, and curling up on the couch with a good book and a box of chocolates is way more fun than doing reps on a leg press machine or slogging away on a treadmill. But damn it, we eat our broccoli anyway, and lift our weights and put in our miles. Just don't make us pretend to be happy about it all the time.

(Note: I have received explicit permission from Crabby to use this image. I'm not a total moron.)

Too many magazine articles and books and TV shows make healthy living and weight loss sound easy and fun. Newsflash: sometimes it's miserable and it takes forever to see results! Do it anyway and you'll be glad you did.

Why are there cupcakes atop your blog? Is that a fave food?I do enjoy a good cupcake! Although to be honest, I was just looking for a cheap stock photo that would be the right size for a header, and the cupcakes looked yummy. I knew I didn't want anything too inspirational like women climbing mountains or something. Because health and fitness isn't just about climbing mountains, it's also about our relationship with cupcakes. Do we eat them sometimes, all the time, or never-ever-ever? Sometimes is hardest. But I think life is too short not to eat cupcakes.

Describe your dream cupcake.
It should have at least two flavors, even if it's just chocolate and vanilla. It can either be something fancy like Magnolia bakery in NYC, or something junky like the Safeway kind. I'm really not all that sophisticated about it. It should, however, be a big-ass cupcake. Not one of those skimpy kind you can gobble up in two bites.

What types of fitness and health news do you like to cover the most? Trends? Studies? Conversely, anything you loathe writing about?
I like a variety--although reading your question I just realized I never seem to write about trends! (Note to self: Start noticing trends or steal some good ones from Leslie.) I write about studies fairly often, just because I do actually care what the scientists recommend even if they change their goddamned minds all the time. If they say "eat blueberries and drink green tea and you'll live a bunch of extra years," I'm one of those people who will actually run out and buy a bunch of blueberries and green tea. I assume my readers have more common sense and just ignore most of these until the evidence becomes more overwhelming.

The fun thing about writing one's own blog is that you can take any weird random thought you have in the bathtub and write a post about it. (The not-fun thing is the "not getting paid" part). Some of my favorite Cranky Fitness posts are just me yammering on about my opinions with no actual news included at all. (Like the "Biggest Diet and Exercise Mistake" post.)

When I write for Diet Blog I struggle a bit more, because I feel like I should be writing about something useful or newsworthy. NOT a problem at Cranky Fitness.

How long have you been blogging and what do you like about the blogging lifestyle?
I started about ten months ago, and it's been totally addictive from day one. For a shy person with lots of opinions, it's a great way for me to interact with people and get a chance to spout off. You meet so many interesting folks and learn so much from other blogs! And I recently talked another blogger, Merry, into joining me at Cranky Fitness which has made it even more fun.

I know you like to ride bikes (of which I am deathly afraid). Any other personal fitness faves?
I do like to bike ride--but I'm afraid of them too unless I'm on a bike path. Traffic freaks me out! I think Merry is more the intrepid biker-commuter type.

I love to run, especially on a lovely trail with an awesome playlist on my iPod. But running aggravates my aging knees, so I can only do so much before I have to cut back and go back to yucky racewalking, which I hate and which makes me look like a dork. Maybe because I'm not really "allowed" to run much, it makes it seem extra fun. If my knees were magically cured and could run all I wanted maybe I wouldn't enjoy it so much.

Work it out: Quiz time!

Just got back from a hot yoga class, which I've been wanting to try forever.

I. Am. So. Tired.

I actually took the elevator up to the second floor of our condo and think I pulled something in my lats while bound in a twisted crow-pretzel thing. But I had a blast and am so happy I tried it - a new, fun thing to do at the gym.

This made me think of this fun quiz I found while browsing at FitSugar.com and have totally aped below (with the editor's permission, obvs!) Tell me...

Nothing Tastes as Good as “Thin”

Did you know that curling into the fetal position quells the hunger pains of a weeklong self-imposed starvation?

What, nobody told you? You didn't know? Well, your daughter does. And she learned it right at home on the family computer.

Children are starting to hate their bodies at younger and younger ages – reports of five-year-olds with severe body image problems have recently surfaced. I’m not saying that droves of toddlers are refusing food or making themselves purge, but the negative self image is manifesting itself earlier and more insidiously. Preschoolers refusing their juice and cookies because they’re “on diets” (Yes – my mother is a preschool teacher and this has happened in her class.) Teenagers seeking out plastic surgery.

A five-year old with an eating disorder?
I’m not a doctor so I can’t speak to whether the medical condition has actually been diagnosed in children this young. But I can say that anecdotally, I have heard from countless parents that their young children are expressing disordered eating behaviors like looking in the mirror and calling themselves fat.

At such a young age, little boys and girls get many of their cues from parents and other family members, friends, teachers and the media. I can easily envision a first grader watching a commercial in which a women is staring at her rear-end in the mirror, frowning, only to grab a weight loss shake or swallow a pill and feel “instantly better!” Such a message translates as “I need to frown when I look in the mirror. I need to stare at my butt. I need to swallow something (but not food!) to feel happier.”

Women of all ages read magazines and watch television shows which portray a big-busted, narrow-hipped, surgically enhanced ideal. Think you’re immune? Check out the Dove Campaign for Real Beauty video, Onslaught. It’s eye-opening.

Ana & Mia sites spreading
The “pro-anorexia” community has long-existed underground, but now the Internet-borne movement predicated on the belief that anorexia and bulimia are desired states is spreading to mainstream social networking sites like MySpace and Facebook. Cloaked by the Web's protective screen, and using "Ana" and "Mia" as pet names for anorexia and bulimia, respectively, the sites host chat rooms for women striving toward emaciation.

A BBC article talks about eating disorder advocates calling for social networking sites to shut down these sites. When my book, Locker Room Diaries: The Naked Truth About Women, Body Image, and Re-Imagining the “Perfect” Body, was published in 2006, I started up a MySpace page to build some awareness and I can tell you, I received oodles of “friend requests” from these pro-ana web sites.

My own struggle
When I was struggling with anorexia myself in college, the whole “pro-ana” movement was still largely underground – I had no idea it even existed. All I had to do was look at a photo of the “It” girl du jour or a skinny class mate to get me thinking about my body and how unhappy I was with it. At the time, I didn’t realize my body was merely the battlefield on which I was playing out a highly emotional inner war.

Around the time I finished grad school, in 2001, Self magazine broke a story on pro-ana websites that blew everyone away. The phrase “thinspo”, short for “thinsipration”, did not roll of the collective at-large tongue. Now, many people – young girls, teenagers and college-aged women especially – know exactly who Ana and Mia are.

What about freedom of speech?
Is it legal to shut down such sites, considering freedom of speech laws? According to DePaul University law professor Jeffrey M. Shaman, a former president of the American Civil Liberties Union in Illinois, private companies such as Yahoo! possess editorial discretion to override free-speech arguments.

"They are fully justified in taking them down, and I would urge them to do just that," he told me when I interviewed him for the Chicago Tribune piece. The government, on the other hand, cannot–First Amendment rights apply to the Internet..

As pro-anorexia chat rooms are plucked from the internet, parents may breathe a collective sigh of relief. But increasingly covert sites may spring up, and it’s becoming more difficult to distinguish between dangerous pro-eating disorder (ED) sites and helpful ED support group sites.

How does the internet contribute to the problem?
Pro-ana sites can serve as instant affirmation for a young girl with a predisposition to body hatred that yes, she should indeed be skinny. Message boards foster communication with other hurting girls and they can trade tips on how to go all day without eating or what laxatives work the best.

This sense of community should not be underestimated. As Dr. Vivian Hanson Meehan, president of ANAD, told me, "Being anorexic is terribly lonely. These are people who don't know they're ill. They feel the need to find like-minded people to bolster their ability to continue this lifestyle."

That said, we can’t blame the internet for eating disorders. So many factors play into the development of anorexia and bulimia--environment, media, family, genetics (many ED professionals invoke the phrase “Society loads the gun; genetics pulls the trigger” to convey the multidimensional nature of these diseases.) And they are diseases – in fact, anorexia has the highest fatality rate of any psychiatric illness. Mind-boggling, but true.

How can parents protect kids from getting access to these pro-ana sites?
This is tricky – I think first, each family needs to consider what level of control they wish to exert over the material their children read and view. Some homes have a V-chip, some keep certain magazines out of the house, while others allow R-rated movies or magazines like Playboy.

I do think parents need to understand that pretty much anything and everything their child looks at which relates to body image has the potential to shape her (or his – body image problems absolutely occur in boys, too) view of her body. A teenager who has no concept of airbrushing may read the Victoria’s Secret catalogs flooding the mailbox and think, “Wow, I guess that’s what I’m supposed to look like.”

A young boy who sees only fat-free or low-carb foods lining the pantry may develop a skewed view of food’s true purpose. A young girl stumbling across her dad’s secret stash of Playboys may find herself believing that women exist as objects to be ogled and stared at.

Let’s start a discussion here about the impact these sites may be having and, more broadly speaking, how we can help protect and educate the younger generation of girls. We can help…what are your ideas?

Eating Disorder Resources:
anad.org
nationaleatingdisorders.org
http://www.something-fishy.org/

From iVillage:
Eating Disorders: Is Your Child at Risk?
Eating Disorders
The 5 Secrets of Raising Healthy Eaters
Nurturing Your Child's Lifestyle: 6 Healthy Tips

From gURL.com:
Eating Disorders trivia quiz
Fast facts eating disorders
Help Me Heather “I frequently crash diet and then go through periods of binging.”
gURL guide to good nutrition
Eating disorders resources

Crazy candy bar quiz, Leslie's rantings and other ways to pass the time

OK, have a little bit of everything here to tell you about. This post is for all of you out there looking to kill 15 minutes, get through the workday afternoon and - wee - learn something in the process!!!

A) I wrote a story in the Chicago Tribune on the concept of alternate day dieting that I think you'll find really interesting - the research behind calorie restriction (CR) -- not to be mistaken with anorexia -- is quite jaw-dropping. Plus, check out these monkeys - need any further proof? The question is..which would you prefer: To full enjoy eating and live to be 80 or to measure everything you eat meticulously and live to 100?

In other Leslie-writing news, I have a piece in the current issue of Health Magazine about s-e-x that was picked up by CNN.com and viewed/emailed more than anything - even the current Presidential debate! People love to read about sex - even if they're not getting any ;-) Also, on Huffington Post, I wrote about the ridiculous banning of a 9-year-old girl from her tennis club because she grunts while hitting the ball. Um, Maria Sharapova, anyone?

B) How well do you know your candy? Take this quiz and find out. I'm not ashamed to say, I got 13 out of 20 correct. But seriously, how is it possible that I don't know what the inside of a 100 Grand Bar looks like? I have let you down, good buddy. Sorry.

C) I tried the Power Plate at my gym - and loved it. Even a simple move like a squat is made 10 times more challenging (without you ever realizing it) because your core has to stabilize your body as you shake a bazillion times a minute. Just don't stand up ramrod straight on the thing or your teeth will clack together and your brain actually rattles. It was not pleasant.

D) On a more self-serving note, some of you may remember my writing about the award I received from my alma mater, UW-Madison. Well, the winners have been publicly announced - here I am. (Click on 'Read about the winners.') The picture on the top is from the photo session I told you about. You like? I'm actually sitting on a scale but you can't really tell. You can re-read my post (linked) for background on my original dilemma.

E) Saving the best...but totally non-Weighting Game-related....for last): I'm going to be an aunt!! My brother and sister-in-law are having a little one - check him/her out, just chilling, here at 11 weeks. Long legs, just like Auntie Lolly!! I am so freaking excited. Already bought my sis-in-law a onesie for the baby that says "I'm proof my mommy puts out."

xooxo

Godspeed**

Talk about running as a religion!

Sister Madonna Buder is a 77-year-old Roman Catholic nun from Spokane, Washington, who traded in her traditional nun's habit for dryfit running shorts and tanks. For those of you not up on your nuns, Sister Madonna is an awe-inspiring athlete and religious professional who uses running (and biking and swimming - she's a triathlete) as a means of reaching out to those in need, raising money for charity and achieving inner spiritual peace. I learned all about her Friday night watching Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel. Yes, my husband and I are totally wild.

Anyhow, Sister Madonna started running when she was 49. According to her Wikipedia entry - everyone who's anyone has one, ya know - is well-known throughout the triathlon community, having completed over 200 triathlons including 13 Ironman Triathlons. May I remind you that these races start off with a 2.4-mile ocean swim, followed by a 112-mile bike ride, then finishing up with a 26.2-mile marathon run? And may I also remind you that Sister Madonna has done all of this between the ages of 49 and 77? Race officials often have to create new age categories because she is the most senior of all athletes. Her trademark quote is "I train religiously."

At the 2005 Hawaii Ironman, at age 75, she became the oldest woman ever to complete the race, finishing one hour before the 17-hour midnight cut-off time. The next year, at age 76, she again became the oldest woman ever to complete the race, finishing with a time of 16:59:03. I was especially awestruck by this last race result because, as she told Bryant Gumbel, she had been ill during the races (stomach problems, I believe) and was concerned she wouldn't be able to finish under the 17-hour cutoff. So, she said, she told God that if she finished in time, that was a sign that her late nephew (whom she running the race for - she dedicates every race for someone in need) was happy and at peace.

People, she finished in 16:59:03.

Sister Buder (or Madge, as I've taken to calling her - only with the highest respect, though) was introduced to athletics in 1978 by a priest who told her running could be spiritually enlightening, that it could help unite the mind, body and soul.

When she began jogging, she quickly learned she had a knack for the sport and thought "how ridiculous would it be for a woman over 50 to run a marathon?" (her quote.) So she began doing just that. She qualified for the Boston Marathon and ran it to raise funds for finding a cure for Multiple Sclerosis.

In 1984 she broken her hip - a double fracture - and was told that she might not be able to walk again. She underwent surgery and healed. In 2004, she broke her humerus and was told it would take 10 weeks to repair. The cast came off at six weeks.

Check out this story (courtesy of wikipedia): At the start of this year's Ironman Canada race, Sister Buder said to herself, "This is the day the Lord has made, so I am ready." She asked for courage and little wind, but the race did not go exactly as planned. She had started walking at about mile eight of the run because of nausea due to a mixture of foods and drinks offered along the course. Sister Buder was expecting to pick up a jacket at mile 13, but it was not there. She had to rummage around in the community box for a warm shirt to complete the race in. She continued on, but the race had to be completed before midnight in order for the results to be official. It was dark and she was by herself and she had two conflicting thoughts. She was tired and thought "you don't need to do this. You don't have anything else to prove." The other thought was "you started this and you have to finish for the other women in the future." She decided to hobble on.

At an aid station a race official told Sister Buder that if she kept walking at a 15 minute per mile pace, she would beat the deadline. She was convinced that she better start running. Allowing herself to throwup, she felt better and resumed running. Just after 11:30pm, well over 16 hours after she started, Sister Buder was heralded onto Lakeshore Drive by race announcer Steve King and cheering crowds. Steve King announced "Ladies and gentlemen, you are witnessing history in the making."

I'm amazed by this woman's dedication, her spirit and her impossibly positive attitude. Her use of goals as powerful incentives is a great tip for any of us to adopt, be it walking a 5K to raise money for a charity or treating yourself to a mani/pedi after a tough week of workouts. As she puts it, there is "No such thing as failure as long as one tries. The only failure is not to try." Love.

** My father has wittily suggested the alternate title of: "Running is a good HABIT to get into." He's very punny. Now you see where I get my sense of humor from.