Can an anorexic woman and an obese woman be best friends?

The story of an unexpected friendship between two women - one obese, the other anorexic.

That's the one-sentence synopsis of the newly released movie, disFIGURED, which I just finished watching on my laptop. (There have been public screenings in NY but the DVD became available nationally on Tuesday; my copy was an early review... thanks to Cinema Libre Studio for the consideration.)

disFIGURED opens up with a group of overweight women who belong to a hardcore Fat Acceptance Group in Venice Beach, Calif. Women of various sizes (but all larger than a Size 12) discuss the indignities of living large in a never-too-thin society. Says one woman, tired of being ignored by others: “There’s too much of me to miss, so if I say 'Excuse me' to you once, and I know I have a voice that you are going to hear..and I get this look, then I’m not nice anymore."

One woman suggests gathering a group of plus-sizers together and telling the airlines who insist on charging double for an overweight person to fly to basically screw themselves if they can't meet their more spacious needs.

And then there's talk of the condescending, ubiquitous phrase, "She let herself go” in reference to a woman who has gained weight. "I didn’t GO anywhere," the Fat Acceptance Group member snarks. "I’m right here."

The opening dialogue moves into a rare plotline that I found shockingly real, touchy, emotional, humorous and hurtful, and introspective for viewers heavy and thin alike. Lydia (played by Deidra Edwards...on the left in this pic) is a group member who wants to start her own Fat Acceptance Walking Group. She announces this to little fanfare from the group at large, who see it as her trying to lose weight and conform to society's pressure to be small.

"We are not a self-help group," the leader admonishes. " We are here to get a screwed-up world to accept us"

Lydia: "What about accepting ourselves?"

Leader: "Well, if you’re having a hard time with that then you have internalized that prejudice. You are trying to change your body, Lydia, and that is self-hatred, pure and simple."

Lydia: "You’re trying to change the world. Does that mean you hate the world?"

Leader (with a smirk): "Yeah...I do. Very often. Don’t you?"

Enter Darcy (Staci Lawrence, on the right), a recovering-anorexic real estate agent. When this ultra-thin woman enters the group, the other women stare at her as if she's a dancing cat in a tutu —is this a figment of their imagination? When finally asked what she's doing there, Darcy explains that, at her anorexic core, she feels fat. She wants to join in the movement.

Her honesty (however clouded by an eating disorder mentality) does not win her any fans—one women says, in a slooowww, are-you-mentally-challenged voice, “This is a fat…acceptance…group.”

And Darcy is summarily ousted.

But through a series of not-so-chance encounters, Darcy and Lydia start a friendship outside the group. Both women are struggling within their bodies, within society, with their families, friends and relationships. Though at first Lydia can't imagine why Darcy would want to be close with her (“I’m your worst nightmare,” she says to her at one point. Darcy does not correct her), they grow close, eventually sharing intimate details about Lydia's sex life (watch for a beautifully-shot, rarely-seen plus-sized sex scene in disFigured.)

Things take a downward turn when Lydia asks Darcy for "anorexia lessons," taking the movie for a twist reminiscent of pro-ana web sites.

disFIGURED is a film about weight and body image, but it's much more: It's about love, friendship, stigma, hatred, parental boundaries, bingeing to fuel emotional needs, the pressure to conform, and much more.

Writer Gers (a man!), who also wrote Mad Money and Fracture, says in the press release, “I wrote, directed, co-edited and financed disFIGURED because it’s a movie I wanted to see. The issues of appearance, control, isolation and our complicated relationships to our own bodies seem universal to me and I wanted to spark a dialogue about weight issues. These are the topics we should be making movies about.”

Watch the trailer here. And leave your comments below. Anyone who has found herself eating Rocky Road out of the pint, only to scrape the carton two minutes later will understand...as will any woman who has sweated it out on the Elliptical while staring at page upon magazine page of stick-like thighs and carved-out waists. Just make sure you see this film—it will open your eyes to your own prejudices, insecurities, comfort zones and ability to change in the most positive of ways.

Comments

That looks very interesting - definitely thought-provoking. thank you for bringing it to my attention.

I cant WAIT to see it!

I'd really like to see it--thanks for telling us about this!

This sounds fascinating--I'll definitely check it out. I wonder if/how doing this movie impacted the body issues of the two lead actresses...

This does sound very interesting! Next time I go to the video store I'll check it out.

I'm dying to see this movie! I love movies/documentaries about eating disorders and how it affects people (not only women per say). I struggled with one in high school and it still plagues me every now and then.

I have a good friend who struggles with one too and it's nice to have someone like her to talk to about all the craziness going on in our heads. We'll both have to sit down and watch this movie together on dvd when we can.

Wow! I just added it to my Netflix queue. Thinking of it, did anyone else watch the TV show "Starved", while it was on FX?

Thank you for bringing this movie up! It seems to be a must see. I'll make sure to check it out.

I went straight to NetFlix and added it to my queue.

Geekgirl--I LOVED "Starved". I was seriously bummed that it didn't get picked up and I wish they'd release it on DVD already (which Eric Schaeffer says he's working on but FX is being uncooperative). I mean parts of it were a bit graphic, but it was very real in a lot of ways, and I loved that it was a predominantly male cast. Eric Schaeffer is very open about his own weight/body image issues, which I think is what made it so real. (I'm a big Eric Schaeffer fan, can you tell?)

i wanna see! i mentioned this on my blog too, because i found it on another site- im glad its getting so much press!

so i can just rent it?

www.groundedfitness.com

Ooooh, yes. I saw a trailer for this a few months ago. It looked rather wonderful a wee film. I like that it highlights the lack of acceptance in an acceptance group...at tolerance camp we will not tolerate intolerance...

I really want to see it, but honestly, I'm afraid of what kind of a can it will open. I deal with so many issues on a daily basis: from making sure my manicure is acceptable, and my lunch doesn't offend a vegetarian, and my shoes match my bag, and whether my ass looks "like an overstuffed suitcase" (thanks grandma!), and my roots are showing, my intestines aren't clean enough and my teeth are too yellow, to not being "nice" enough to coworkers, can't keep a fully stocked fridge for my parents to feel better about raising me, don't call my needy sister nearly enough, not checking up on the aforementioned nutcase of a grandmother because she might die or leave the stove on, my hatred of recycling and being criticized by people for choosing not to have kids or pets while they're so miserable with their kids and pets.
Bah, I'll just see the movie. Just don't wanna tell myself excuses such as "you don't have it as bad as other people." Or "It's mostly muscle." Yeah, 200lbs of muscle. That's more than Ahhnuld.

I can't WAIT to see this! It looks so interesting.

This reminded me of a story- I think its from a Chuck Palaniuk book but I could be completely wrong- about how theres a group of women who have been discriminated against by men. One day this woman whom they think is trans gendered comes in and they get incredibly angry and start tearing off her clothes and feeling her up and trying to determine if shes male or female. In short, they humiliate her and abuse her just in just the same way as they themselves have been humiliated and abused, and they don't understand the real impact of what they're doing.

Thanks so much for posting this- I'm sure its going to raise all kinds of social/psychological questions once more people have seen the film.

I so want to see this movie. Contrary to popular belief, the fat acceptance movement has a lot of internal divisions. It will be nice to see a nuanced portrayal of both sides of the story instead of a politically correct (or incorrect) diatribe. At least I hope that this is what the movie does. It sounds like it, from your review.

This just might make me make my first trip to a movie rental place in over two years!

fyi - for those of you interested, disFigured can be purchased through www.cinemalibrestudio.com and is also available through major rentailers and video retailers including Hollywood Video and Netflix.

Definitely a must-see. Thanks, Leslie.

V.

I guess a UK release is optimistic but I'll keep my eyes out - this looks cool!

TA x

I must see this. Thanks!

it's already on the top of my netflix queque

I loved the story about the disFIGURED but I haven't watched the movie yet. I do want to see it now. SOunds like we can all learn from it.
I like reading your page and the info you always provide. Thanks!!!!
Cheers
Mari

I can't believe that's Ryan from The Biggest Loser! Has he gained back all of the weight he lost on the show? That adds another layer to this really interesting-looking film, don'tcha think?

the trailer has me hooked. I need to get this movie!

I've been waiting for this to come out on DVD. Finally!

Thanks for posting about the movie, Leslie! I found a copy at my local Hollywood Video and watched it last night. Fantastic film - it dealt with the issues of body image and our obsession with "perfection" in a very sensitive, nuanced way.

I definitely want to see this! When is it being released?

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I think that movies like DisFigured and books like Embracing Your Big Fat Ass are exactly what we need right now. We all need to learn to accept and love ourselves as we are, and by extension we need to learn to accept and love each other as we are too without trying to force each other to change to fit our own preconceived ideas.

In my life alone I've been the 120lb woman, the 260lb woman, and now currently the 145lb woman and this trailer looks like it should be showed to school age girls.